気をつけましょう｡ 以上！
(銀時)よい子のみんな～ 部屋を明るくして➡
姿勢を正して こんな大人にならないように➡
[Caution]
To all you good boys and girls,
turn on the light in your room and sit up straight.
Be careful not to become an adult like this.
That's all.
[The mysterious space creature "Elizabeth": born September 7. 180 cm. 123 kg.]
[1st Annual Weird Cosmic Pet Grand Prix Hosted by well-known Tamosan.]
(桂)時間は？
What time is it?
It should be soon.
(志士)はい もう そろそろのはずなんですが…｡
遅いな…｡ まさか 坂本のﾔﾂめ➡
He's late.
That darn Sakamoto better not stand us up...
すっぽかす つもりではあるまいな｡ ん？
(志士)桂さん あれ！
Katsura! There!
(桂)来たようだな…｡
Looks like he's here.
♪♪～
(桂)坂本は いないのか？
Sakamoto's not here?
He's wandering off like always.
(陸奥)相変わらず ﾌﾗﾌﾗしとるぜよ｡
He's one troublesome boss.
まったく 困った頭ぜよ｡
ﾌｯ そうか…｡
I see.
So, why did you call us out to a place like this?
それで こんなところへ呼び出して 何の用だ？
用件は これぜよ｡
It's about this.
It's a present from our boss. It's addressed to you, Katsura.
(陸奥)頭からのﾌﾟﾚｾﾞﾝﾄじゃ｡
(陸奥)桂さん ｱﾝﾀ宛てじゃ｡ (桂)ｵﾚに？
To me?
♪♪～
(桂)これは…｡
Th-This is...
["Pets Resemble Their Owners"]
ふぬぉ～～っ!!
♪♪～
You can't do this. You can't do your business here.
おめっ ﾀﾞﾒだって！ こんなところで 用足したら…！
お前の排泄物は➡
Your doo-doo is bigger than the size of furniture!
わんぱく坊主の夢より でかいんだから!!
ﾁｸｼｮｳ！ だから散歩なんざ 嫌だったんだよ！
Dammit! This is why I hate walking you!
｢面倒は 必ず私が見るｱﾙ～｣とか 言ってたくせによ～！
And after she said "I promise to take care of him!"
In the end, it's always the mom who winds up taking care of the dog!
最終的には ぜってえ～ お母さんが➡
犬の世話することに なってんだ…！
あれ？ ｵﾚ お母さん？
What? Am I the mom now?
Hmph. You can't even train a pet? Sad.
(桂)ﾌﾝ｡ ﾍﾟｯﾄのしつけもできんとは 情けない｡
If you can't even control just one pet, how do you intend to move an entire nation?
動物１匹 自由にできんようで➡
天下国家を どうして動かせようか｡
And you call yourself a samurai?
ｷｻﾏ それでも侍か？
Zura! What's that, that...thing!
ﾂﾞﾗ… なんだ？ それ｡ 気持悪っ！
Gross!
気持悪くない｡ ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽだ｡
It's not gross. It's Elizabeth.
Well, maybe it isn't so bad on its own, but paired with you...it's gross.
単体で見ると そうでもねえが お前とｾｯﾄになると 気持悪いよ！
I guess that means you're gross.
っていうか お前が 気持悪い！
(桂)坂本のﾊﾞｶが この間 ｵﾚのところに➡
That idiot Sakamoto dropped by my place the other day and left it behind.
勝手に 置いていったんだ｡
He probably picked it up on some foreign planet.
(桂)大方 どこぞの星で 拾ってきたんだろう｡
Seems he's totally caught up with space travel.
(桂)相変わらず 宇宙航海などに➡
うつつを 抜かしているらしいからな…｡
(定春の うなり声)
Aren't you the guy who hates aliens?
ｵﾒｴ 地球外生物は 嫌いじゃなかったのか？
こんな思想も何もない者を どう嫌いになれというんだ｡
How could I hate an innocent creature like this?
それに…➡
And besides...
結構 かわいいだろ？
She's kinda cute, don't you think?
Okay, let's go, Elizabeth. Shall we take our walk on the riverbank?
(桂)よ～し いくぞ ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽ｡ 今日は 河川敷まで行こうか｡
Zura... What the heck are you...
ﾂﾞﾗ… お前 いったい…｡
んっ!?
Hey! What the?! Stop that!
あ～っ！ お前 なにやってんだよ！
It's humongous! And stinks!
うわっ でかっ！ ｱﾝﾄﾞ くさっ！
だから ﾀﾞﾒだって言ったじゃ～ん！
I told you to stop!
(吠え声)
無念…｡
Good grief.
(新八)へぇ～ あの桂さんがねぇ…｡
Oh, Katsura did that...?
意外なところもあるんすね｡
He sure has his weird side.
まあな｡ ﾔﾂも 丸くなったってことじゃねえの｡
Yeah, guess he's sort of mellowed.
ｳﾁのも もらってくんねえかな｡
Think he might take ours, too?
生産性のねえﾔﾂは ｳﾁにはいらねえや…｡
We don't need a roommate who doesn't contribute.
ｺｲﾂが産むのは ｳﾝｺと痛みだけじゃねえか｡
The only things he contributes is feces and pain!
That kind of talk is not nice to Sadaharu, nope nope.
(神楽)そんな言い方 定春に失礼ｱﾙ｡
定春 そのまま 噛み砕くよろし｡
Sadaharu! Go ahead and gnaw his skull down to the bone, yep.
待て待て 待て待て！ わかった わかった｡
Wait! Wait! Wait! Wait! All right, I'm sorry.
Feces, pain, and urine!
ｳﾝｺと痛み ﾌﾟﾗｽ ｼｯｺだ！
Okay, Sadaharu, let him go.
よし 定春 離してやれｱﾙ｡
It's not okay. He didn't add anything positive to that list!
よしじゃねえよ！ ろくなもん ﾌﾟﾗｽされてねえじゃねえか！
(新八)だいたい ﾍﾟｯﾄは 安らぎを与えてくれる存在ですよ｡
Anyway, pets are just supposed to provide stress relief.
You shouldn't expect any other compensation from them.
見返り求めるほうが 間違ってますよ｡
We're looking for unusual pets for our show.
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)番組では 変なﾍﾟｯﾄを募集しています｡
Huh?
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)鎖国解禁以来 我が国には 天人とともに➡
[1st champion: Susumu]
Ever since our country opened up to the galaxy,
[2nd champion: Hiroyuki]
many different animals have arrived with the Amanto.
さまざまな生物が やってきております｡
[3rd champion: Satoru]
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)あなたの近所にも 変なﾍﾟｯﾄがいませんか？
Is there a strange pet living in your neighborhood?
We'll be crowning the strangest and cutest pet in Japan on our show!
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)当番組では そんな 変で かわいいﾍﾟｯﾄを集め➡
日本一を 決定したいと思います｡
The winner will receive a fabulous prize...
ｸﾞﾗﾝﾌﾟﾘには 豪華賞品が…｡
Stress relief...or fabulous prizes...which would you rather have?
安らぎと豪華賞品 どっちが欲しい？
(お登勢)１週間!?
One week?!
For sure.
あぁ 間違いねえ！ １週間 待ってくれりゃ➡
If you'll wait one week, I'll pay you the money gift-wrapped, so don't worry.
ﾉｼつけて払ってやるから 心配すんな！
I feel like an oil tycoon! I can have all the pickled seaweed I want!
気分は すでにｵｲﾙﾀﾞﾗｰよ！ 酢こんぶ 食べ放題ｱﾙよ！
ｵｲﾙのわりには やけに 野望が ちっちゃいな おい｡
For an oil tycoon, you've got small ambitions...
You sure seem confident. Do you have something in mind?
(お登勢)ずいぶんと 余裕だね～｡ 何か あてでもあるのかい？
…ある！
I do.
Unusual for him!
珍しくな！ 一応ですけど…｡
Sort of...
なんか 眉唾くさい気もするけどねぇ…｡
I'm getting the feeling it's something fishy...
(ｷｬｻﾘﾝ)お登勢さん こんなﾔﾂらの言うこと➡
Otose! You mustn't trust what these guys say!
信用したらﾀﾞﾒよ｡ 絶対 ﾊｯﾀﾘですよ｡
It's all just talk! All B.S.!
ｳｿ八百ですよ｡ おい ﾃﾒｴ！
Hey, you, why're you back here looking as though nothing happened?
なに 当たり前な顔して 再登場してやがんだ ｺﾗ～！
たしか 今頃 塀の中ｱﾙ！
If I'm not mistaken, you're in jail right now!
ｷｬｻﾘﾝは この前 保釈になって 出てきたのさ｡
Catherine was just recently released.
She had nowhere else to go, so she came back here.
他に 行くあてもないんで また 舞い戻ってきたんだよ｡
You sure are an eccentric, old lady...
しかし ばあさん ｱﾝﾀも 物好きだね～｡
店の金を かっぱらったｺｿ泥を もう一度 雇うとは…➡
hiring this thief who ran off with your shop's money...
更生でも させるつもりか！
Are you trying to reform her or something?
そんなんじゃないよ｡ 人手が足りなかっただけさ～ね｡
Nothing like that. I just needed the help.
…まっ いいけどな｡
Well, that's fine with me.
I'm warning you, don't touch my stuff, you cat-eared alien!
くれぐれも 私のものだけには 手を出すなよ！ この 猫耳星人！
盗むもんもないくせに 偉そうに言うんじゃねえぞ！
Don't talk big when you don't even have anything worth stealing, you girly alien!
この 小娘星人！
Watch it, you alien hag!
気をつけるｱﾙよ くそ年増星人！
I'll stuff a live fish into your mailbox one day!
いつか ﾎﾟｽﾄに 生魚 ぶちこんでやるよ！
食べずに我慢できるなら やってみろ！
I dare you to go without eating, you alien glutton!
この 大食らい星人！ 確かに…｡
Good one.
まっ 今日は ｷｬｻﾘﾝの顔見せもあったからね｡
Well, you've all had the chance to meet Catherine...
１週間だよ｡ もし 払わなかったら…➡
One week. If you don't pay me by then,
どうなるか わかってるね？
you know what'll happen, don't you?
よし ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽ 今日は 公園にでも行ってみようか｡
Okay, Elizabeth, shall we go to the park today?
Well then, let's go.
…そうか｡ ならば 行くぞ｡
よし！ ﾊﾞｯﾁこい!!
Come on, bring it!
ﾔｯﾊ～！ いつでもｵｯｹｰだ!!
Whenever you're ready!
よし 定春 がんばるｱﾙよ｡ ﾊｯ ﾊｯ｡
Okay, Sadaharu, do your best.
(神楽)よ～し｡ いけ 定春！
Okay, go! Sadaharu!
♪♪～
定春！ お手!!
Sadaharu! Your paw!
ぐはぁっ!!
定春！ おかわり!!
Sadaharu! Now the other one!
ぐわぁっ!!
Sadaharu! Sit!
(神楽)定春！ おすわり!!
(銀時/新八)ぐぉっ…｡ よし いける！
Okay, we can do this! He's gotten much better!
だいぶ 上達してきたｱﾙね！
いや あのさ… まず 最初に もうちょっと➡
Uh, could you tell him to be a bit more gentle?
そっと やってくれるように 言ってもらえませんか？
っていうか ほら➡
What he means is, we're risking our lives for every basic trick.
基本のしつけで いちいち 命がけだから…｡
(桂)何をしている？ あ…｡
What're you doing?
なんだ ﾂﾞﾗか｡
Oh, it's you, Zura...
ﾂﾞﾗじゃない｡ 桂だ｡
It's not Zura, it's Katsura.
それより 何をしているのか と 聞いている｡
But more importantly, I want to know what you're doing.
見て わからないｱﾙか？ 定春に 芸を仕込んでるｱﾙよ｡
Can't you see? We're teaching Sadaharu tricks.
ほぅ そうか｡ それは つまり➡
Oh, is that so?
Which means you took my advice and had a change of heart?
ｵﾚのｱﾄﾞﾊﾞｲｽを聞き入れ 心を入れ替えたというわけか｡
ﾊﾞｶ言うな！
Don't be an idiot! Who'd have a change of heart just because of what you said?!
誰が ｵﾒｴの言葉なんかで 心 入れ替えるかってぇの！
今度 定春が ﾃﾚﾋﾞに出るｱﾙよ｡ (桂)ﾃﾚﾋﾞ？
Sadaharu's going to be on TV.
TV?
そのために 特訓中だ｡
That's why we're doing special training.
Not that it's of any interest to a wanted man like you, right?
まぁ お尋ね者のお前には 関係ねえ話だけど… あぁっ!!
Okay, next is sitting up! Sadaharu!
(神楽)よし！ 次は ちんちんｱﾙよ 定春！
(銀時/新八)ぐぉっ…！
ﾃﾚﾋﾞ…｡
...TV.
(ﾃｰﾏ曲)
[1st Annual Weird Cosmic Pet Grand Prix]
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)変であることを恐れるな！
No pet contestant is too strange!
The stranger, the more original.
変とは つまり ｵﾘｼﾞﾅﾘﾃｨｰだ！
1st Annual Weird Cosmic Pet Grand Prix!
(歓声)
(お登勢)ただいま～｡ おかえりなさい｡
I'm Ho-ome!
Welcome back.
(ｷｬｻﾘﾝ)どうでした？ お登勢さん｡
How did it go, Otose?
Not good. They ran off again.
ﾀﾞﾒだ｡ また逃げやがったよ ｱｲﾂら｡
ったく 家賃回収のたびに 逃げ回りやがって｡
They run away every time I go to collect the rent.
見つけたら ﾎﾞｺﾎﾞｺにしてやるよ｡
If I ever catch 'em, I'll beat the living daylights outta 'em.
ああいうﾔﾂらは 何 言ったって ﾑﾀﾞﾑﾀﾞ｡
Nothing you say is going to work with people like that.
腐ったﾐｶﾝは 周りも腐らす｡
One rotten apple spoils the batch.
腐らす前に追い出す いちばんですよ｡
The best thing is to chase them out before they ruin everything.
Isn't that talking too big for someone who was just released from jail?
保釈で出てきたばかりの分際で➡
ずいぶん偉そうな 物言いじゃないか｡
That was that. This is this.
それは それ｡ これは これ｡ ったく いけしゃあしゃあと｡
You sure have nerve.
Otose! Otose! Look at that!
お登勢さん！ お登勢さん！ あれ あれ!!
うるせえなぁ！ また ﾑｼｮに ぶち込まれてえのか!?
Quiet! Do you want to get thrown back into the slammer?! Do you?!
見て 見て！ ﾃﾚﾋﾞ!!
Look. Look at the TV!
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)新宿 かぶき町から 来ていただきました➡
Welcome from Kabukicho, Shinjuku, space creature Sadaharu and his owners, the Sakata family.
宇宙生物 定春君と 飼い主の 坂田さんﾌｧﾐﾘｰです｡
(お登勢)坂田さんﾌｧﾐﾘｰ!?
Sakata family?! What the hell are those morons up to now?!
なにやってんだ ｱｲﾂら！
(ｷｬｻﾘﾝ)ｱｲﾂらの家賃のあてって これのことだったんですね｡
Their way of paying the rent...this is what they were talking about.
The team that gets past the preliminary round will earn the right to face our previous champion...
予選を勝ち抜いたﾁｰﾑの 皆さんには➡
前回のﾁｬﾝﾋﾟｵﾝ ﾏｽｸ･ﾄﾞ･ﾑｰさん一家の ﾐｽ･ｶﾞｰﾀｰﾍﾞﾙﾄちゃんへの挑戦権が➡
the Mask du Meow family and their pet, Miss Garter Belt!
与えられます｡ がんばってくださいね｡
Good luck!
Bring it on!
(ﾑｰさん)かかってこいや！ (ｶﾞｰﾀｰﾍﾞﾙﾄ)ｼｬ～ｯ！
ﾎﾝﾄに来ちゃいましたね｡
I can't believe we're actually doing this.
やるからには てっぺん狙うぞ｡ 気合い入れてけ！
We're playing to win. So psych yourself up!
Uh, is that Sadaharu clamped onto Sakata? Are you all right?
え～と… こちら 坂田さんに 食いついて離さないのが 定春君？
っていうか 大丈夫ですか？ 大丈夫っすよ｡
I'm fine. Sadaharu is a bright pup. This is his playful bite.
定春は 賢いこだから ちゃんと 手加減してますからね｡
血 出てるんすけど…｡
But you're bleeding...
Gin, the judges are getting worried.
銀さん 審査員 ひいてますよ｡ 血 止めて｡ 止めて！
Stop the bleeding! Stop it!
Stop Sadaharu, Kagura!
神楽ちゃん 定春 止めてよ～｡
神楽ちゃんの言うことしか 聞かないんだから｡
He won't listen to anybody but you, Kagura.
う うん｡
Right.
定春～ めっ｡ 晩ごはん 抜きにするｱﾙよ｡
Sadaharu! Stop! No snacks for you tonight!
Are you ignoring me, too?!
ｵﾒｴも抜きにされてえのか！
ちょっと～ ちゃんとやってくださいよ｡
Come on! Pull yourselves together. We can't get to the finals like this!
こんなんじゃ 決勝まで 勝ち残れるわけないでしょ！
That so? The judges can't take their eyes off of me.
そうか？ 審査員のﾔﾂら ｵﾚに くぎづけになってるぞ｡
Of course they can't take their eyes off of you. Look in the mirror!
そりゃ くぎづけにもなるわ！ 鏡で 自分の顔 見てこい!!
２人とも 動きが かたいね！ 舞台を ﾌﾙに使っていこう！
You're both stiff. Use the entire stage!
Move your bodies more!
体 もっと動かそう！ ｵﾒｴが いちばんｶﾞﾁｶﾞﾁじゃねえか！
You're the one who looks like a robot!
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)え～ ﾍﾟｯﾄ以上に個性的な 飼い主さんたちみたいですね｡
It would seem the owners are more unusual than their pet.
Let's cut to commercial.
じゃあ いったん CMです｡
は～い｡ じゃあ 次のﾁｰﾑの方 どうぞ！
All right! Let's welcome our next team.
Our next unusual pet is...
続いての 変てこﾍﾟｯﾄは➡
space creature Elizabeth, and her owner, Space Captain Katsura!
宇宙生物 ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽちゃん➡
そして 飼い主の 宇宙ｷｬﾌﾟﾃﾝ ｶﾂｰﾗさんです｡
What's he up to?
なにやってんの ｱｲﾂ｡
指名手配中のﾔﾂが 変装までして ﾃﾚﾋﾞに出てきたよ｡
A wanted man is disguising himself to get on TV.
He seems to really love his pet.
よほど ﾍﾟｯﾄが気に入ってるようですね｡
He likes his pet, but he's also in love with that costume.
(神楽)ﾍﾟｯﾄも そうだけど あの衣装も気に入ってるｱﾙ｡
Katsura, what exactly is a Space Captain?
え～ ｶﾂｰﾗさん 宇宙ｷｬﾌﾟﾃﾝって 要するに 何なんですかね？
A captain in space.
要するに 宇宙のｷｬﾌﾟﾃﾝです｡ え…？
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)え～ あちらの定春ちゃんと対戦し➡
You'll be facing Sadaharu over there. The winner advances to the finals.
勝ち残ったほうが 決勝へと進めるわけですが…➡
How confident are you?
どうですか？ 自信のほどは｡
あんなの ただの でかい犬じゃないですか｡
That's nothing but a huge dog.
ｳﾁの実家の太郎も あれくらいありますよ｡
My dog Taro back home is about that size.
What's that, Zura?!
んだ ｺﾗ！ ﾂﾞﾗ！
Stuff like that monster penguin of yours comes out of the faucet when I turn on the spigot at home!
ﾃﾒｴの その ﾍﾟﾝｷﾞﾝおばけみてえなﾔﾂもな➡
ｳﾁの実家じゃ 水道の蛇口 ひねったら 普通に出てきたぞ｡
Too obvious! Stop making up such transparent lies!
ﾊﾞﾚるよ！ ﾊﾞﾚるｳｿは やめて!!
ｱﾋﾟｰﾙﾀ～ｲﾑ！
It's time to appeal to our judges!
Come on and give it up.
ﾄﾞﾝﾄﾞﾝﾄﾞﾝ！ ﾊﾟﾌ ﾊﾟﾌ！
では 第１回戦！
It's time for the first round.
Show our judges your pet's most attractive features!
お互いのﾁｬｰﾑﾎﾟｲﾝﾄを それぞれ ｱﾋﾟｰﾙしてください｡
As we always mention, our judges assign scores according to their own arbitrary judgment.
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)いつも言ってることですが 審査員の先生たちが➡
独断と偏見で 得点を算出いたします｡
では まず 坂田さんﾌｧﾐﾘｰから ｱﾋﾟｰﾙﾀｲﾑ いってください！
All right, let's begin with the Sakata family. This is your time to shine. Go!
Okay! Let's show them the results of your special training!
いいｱﾙか？ 特訓の成果 見せつけるｱﾙよ！
Damn right you will.
当たりめえだよ ﾎﾝﾄ｡
We can't let this past week of bloody effort go to waste.
この１週間の 血のにじむ苦労 ﾑﾀﾞにしてたまるかよ！
Spraying blood around isn't really work, though.
血が噴き出すの 間違いですけどね｡
(神楽)準備はいいｱﾙか～？ 銀ちゃ～ん 新八～！
Are you ready, Gin? Shinpachi?
いいｱﾙね？ 定春｡ ﾊｯ ﾊｯ｡
Ready, Sadaharu?
大丈夫 自分を信じなさい｡
This will work. Trust in yourself.
お母さん ｱﾝﾀは ﾎﾝﾄは できる子だって➡
Mom believes in you, son.
信じてるからね｡ 誰に話してるんですか？
Who are you talking to?
よし！ 定春…➡
Okay, Sadaharu! Go!
いけぇ～!!
ﾊｯ ﾊｯ ﾊｯ…！
Sadaharu! Your paw!
(神楽)定春 お手！ ぐはぁっ！
Now the other one!
(神楽)おかわり！ ぐほぉっ！
The final trick! Sit!
(神楽)とどめだ！ おすわり!! (銀時/新八)ぐぉっ…！
Okay! Perfect!
(神楽)おっしゃ！ 完璧ｱﾙ!!
Hmph. It's no different than the last time!
ﾌﾝ この前と 何も変わってないではないか｡
As if force and blood are all it takes to call something a trick.
勢いと流血だけで 芸というなら 何の苦労もいらん｡
My Elizabeth doesn't do such lowly tricks.
ｳﾁのｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽは そんな下等な芸などしない｡
では 次は ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽちゃんの ｱﾋﾟｰﾙﾀｲﾑ！ どうぞ！
Now, it's Elizabeth's time to appeal to our judges.
Go ahead!
これを見ろ!!
Watch this!
紙と筆…｡ それで いったい何を？
Paper and brushes?! What is she going to do?!
(桂)さぁ 見せつけてやれ ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽ！
Yes...
Show them, Elizabeth!
♪♪～
Oh! Elizabeth's drawing like crazy all of a sudden!
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)お～っと！ ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽちゃん➡
いきなり 何かを 猛烈に描き出した～!!
(観客たち)おぉ～…！ (拍手)
な なんだ ありゃ？
Wh-What's that...?
It's a wonderful painting!
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)やけに みごとな絵が 完成しましたよ｡
It's as though a human painted it!
まるで 人間が 描いたかのような絵です！
Hey, announcer, what kind of way is that to describe it?!
おい 司会！ なんだ その言い方は！
ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽに失礼であろう！
That's being rude to Elizabeth.
Uh... Forgive me.
あ いや… すみません｡
Hmph. I could paint better than that!
ﾌﾝ あんなのより 私が描いたほうが うまいｱﾙよ！
いや… そういう問題じゃないから｡
No, that's not the point.
大丈夫だ｡ ｲﾝﾊﾟｸﾄなら ｵﾚたちのほうが勝ってる｡
It's all right. We win on impact. Don't worry.
心配すんな｡ 勝ってるのは 血の量だけですよ！
We only won on quantity of blood.
いい仕事してますねぇ…｡
This is fine work...
これは かなりの高得点が 狙えそうですよ｡
I think this will achieve quite a high score.
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)では 審査員の皆さん 得点のほうを どうぞ！
All right, judges, let's see your scores.
(ﾄﾞﾗﾑﾛｰﾙ)
(ﾌｧﾝﾌｧｰﾚ)
My! We've got quite a point spread from the very start!
おぉっと！ これは いきなり➡
かなりの点差が できてしまいました！
はたして これから 逆転は可能なのか!?
Will it be possible to turn the tables?!
That's what I'd like to know.
いや… それ こっちが 聞きたいんですけど｡
ﾌﾝ… 勝負あったな｡
Hmph. The match is over.
(ﾌｧﾝﾌｧｰﾚ)
それでは 第２回戦に 移らせてもらいますよ｡
We'll now move on to round two.
私の投げた このﾌﾗｲﾄﾞﾁｷﾝの骨を➡
I will toss this fried chicken bone. The first pet that fetches this bone back to its master will be the winner.
先にくわえ 持ち帰ったほうが勝ち｡
飼い主の誘導も 結構ですよ｡
Feel free to yell commands at your pet. If you win this event, you will receive 30,000 points.
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)ちなみに これに勝つと➡
３万点です！ 気合いを入れて ﾁｬﾚﾝｼﾞしてください！
Put your heart and soul into this challenge!
おい司会！ だったら さっきの １回戦は なんだったのだ？
Hey, announcer. Then what was the purpose of the first round?
Well, as a show, we needed to build the excitement...
いえ やはり 番組としては 盛り上がりというものが…｡
そんなもの必要ない！ 今すぐ ﾙｰﾙを訂正しろ！
You don't need to do that! Change the rules right now!
おいｺﾗ ﾂﾞﾗ！ 主催者様に いちゃもんつけてんじゃねえぞ｡
Hey Zura. Don't argue with the producers!
文句があんなら とっとと帰れ｡
If you've got a problem with it, go on home!
What?!
なにぃ!? まぁまぁ… とにかく➡
Now, now.
Anyhow, this will determine the winner.
これで勝負が決まります｡
Both of you, good luck.
両者ともに がんばってくださいよ｡
Why don't we just skip the boring contest and duke it out like men?
んな まどろっこしいこと やめてよぉ➡
男らしく 殴り合いでいこうや｡
I was hoping you'd say that!
望むところだ｡ いや ｵﾒｴらじゃねえよ！
No, this isn't your fight! Cut it out, damn you!
いいかげんにしろ ｵﾒｴら！
これ もしかしたら 勝てるんじゃない？
Hey, maybe we can win this, after all!
ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽは どう見ても 鈍足そうだもん｡
Elizabeth looks pretty slow on her feet, doesn't she, Kagura?
ねぇ 神楽ちゃん… あれっ？
[Shinpachi, say something funny.]
もう 帰れば…｡
Why don't you go home?
Okay, here we go!
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)それじゃあ いきますよ！
Ready...
位置について… よ～い！
Get set...
うおぉ…！
どぉ～ん!!
Go!
あぁ～っと これは！
What do we have here?!
うわぁっ… あっ ちょっと！
♪♪～
Idiot! The other way!
ﾊﾞｶ ｵﾒｴ あっちだって！
Sadaharu ran the wrong way, and is chasing after his owner!
定春ちゃん いきなり逆走して 飼い主を追いかけ始めたぞ！
やめろ！ だから あっちだってば！
Stop! It's the other way, I'm telling you!
(審査員たち)うわぁあ！ とぅっ！
(破壊音)
Uh-oh! Sakata charged into the judges' table!
おぉっと！ 坂田さんが 審査員席に乱入！
っていうか やめろよっ！ ｾｯﾄ壊すな おい！
Stop that! Don't destroy the set!
さて 一方 ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽちゃんのほうは…｡
As for Elizabeth...
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)ものすごいｽﾋﾟｰﾄﾞだ！
What speed!
一見 不利かと思われた ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽちゃん➡
Elizabeth looked to be at a disadvantage, but she's running at awesome speed!
すっごいｽﾋﾟｰﾄﾞで 駆けていく！
あれっ？ 気のせいか？
Huh? Are my eyes playing tricks on me?!
For an instant, I saw what looked like an old man's leg.
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)一瞬 ｵｯｻﾝの 足のようなものが…｡
There it is again! Hey, old man!
あっ また見えた！ ほらっ ｵｯｻ…｡
言いがかりは やめろ｡
Enough with your false accusations!
ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽは この日のために 特訓を重ねたんだ｡
Elizabeth trained hard just for today.
ｵｯｻﾝとか そんなこと言うな｡
Don't call her an old man or things like that!
あ… すみません｡
Uh... Sorry.
Gin!
銀さん！
If you're going to run away, run away toward the bone!
どうせ逃げるなら 骨のほうへ逃げてくださいよ！
神楽ちゃん 定春 呼び戻して！
Kagura! Call Sadaharu back!
[I'm feeling a bit hungry.]
誰に言ってんだよ…｡
Who're you talking to...?
よせっ！ くんじゃねえ ﾊﾞｶ犬！
Don't come this way! Stop, you stupid dog!
危ねえっ！ そこ どけって!!
Look out!
Out of the way!
どくわけには いかないな｡
I'm not moving. As Annual Weird Cosmic Pet Grand Prix champion and its owner...
変てこﾍﾟｯﾄ第４代ﾁｬﾝﾋﾟｵﾝと その飼い主として…｡
♪♪～
はあぁ…｡
I can't run from here! I'll take you on!
ここで 逃げるわけにはいかない！
受けてたつぞ！
Miss Garter Belt! Execute Plan C!
ﾐｽ･ｶﾞｰﾀｰﾍﾞﾙﾄ ﾌﾟﾗﾝＣだ！
(ｶﾞｰﾀｰﾍﾞﾙﾄ)ぐあぁあっ！
ぐはぁっ！ (ｶﾞｰﾀｰﾍﾞﾙﾄ)ｷｭ～！
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)おぉっと ﾁｬﾝﾋﾟｵﾝ あっさりと敗北です…｡
Oh! Our champion is defeated so easily!
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)決勝は いったい どうなるんでしょう？
How will we hold our finals?
(破壊音)
ふごぁあ…｡
Sadaharu bites Sakata!
そして 定春ちゃん とうとう坂田さんに➡
食らいついた！
Just what on earth is your relationship, anyway?!
いったい なんなんだ お前らの関係は!?
Gin! What'll we do? We're about to lose!
銀さん！ どうしよう もうﾀﾞﾒだ！
Sadaharu, move!
定春 どくｱﾙよ｡
Oh look, look. Want this?
ほ～れ ほ～れ 欲しいかい ｺｲﾂが｡
おいおい おろせ ｸｿｶﾞｷ！
Come one, come on, put me down, you damn brat!
いっけぇ～！
Go!
いくのぉ～!?
Go?!
うわぁあ～！
だあぁあ！
(吠え声)
(ﾀﾓｻﾝ)これは坂田さん➡
It appears Sakata is using himself as bait
定春君が 自分に 食らいついてくるのを利用し➡
to lure Sadaharu!
ｴｻになった～！
Sadaharu is charging like a rhino! But Elizabeth has nearly reached the bone.
猛然と駆ける 定春君！ しかしｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽちゃん➡
すでに 骨に手を…｡
♪♪～
豪華賞品は 渡さん！
No fabulous prize for you.
ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽを離せ！
Let go of Elizabeth!
豪華賞品は ｵﾚとｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽのもの…｡
The fabulous prize belongs to me and Elizabeth.
ﾌｯ… なんだかんだ言っても ご主人様が好きか｡
After all is said and done, you love your master, don't you?
だが それ以上 噛みつこうものなら➡
But if you bite any harder,
ｷﾐのご主人の首を折るぞ！
I'll snap your master's neck.
What are you gonna do?
さぁ どうする？ どうするじゃねえよ！
He's not gonna do anything! He doesn't understand you!
通じるわきゃねえだろ！
ﾃﾒｴらよ！ 競技変わってんじゃねえか！
You bastards! You changed the format of the contest!
頼むから 普通にやってくれよ！
Please, if you don't follow the rules, we can't broadcast this!
放送できねえよ これ！
Who cares about your broadcast!
放送など 知ったことか！
ぐぅっ… がぁっ！
(ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽ)あぁ もういいっすわ｡
Oh, the hell with it.
(ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽ)なんか だるい…｡
I'm pooped.
(ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽ)もう 帰るんで ちょっと上 どけてもらえます？
I'm going home. Can you just get off me?
なあぁあ～！ これは!?
What's going on?!
ｳｿだろ… ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞ…｡
That can't be. Elizabe...
[One moment please]
What the hell was that?!
(お登勢)んだそりゃあぁ！ ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽに 何があったんだい!?
What happened to Elizabeth?!
(お登勢)おいっ ｴﾘｻﾞﾍﾞｽ～！
Hey! Elizabeth!
[Preview]
Until just a while ago, I was headed straight on the path to success,
but after I did that thing on a whim, I lost everything.
The next episode:
"If You Stop and Think About It, Your Life's a Lot Longer as an Old Guy than a Kid! Whoa, Scary!!"
All I have now are my sunglasses.
[Taizo Hasegawa, age 38, unemployed. Formerly a ranking Shogunate official.]
[Currently looking for employment throwing away his pride. But, he can't throw away his shades.]
[What are you jerks looking at?]
♪♪～
♬『ゼッコーチョー！』
♬～