(銀時)おい…｡
(お妙)みんな さようなら｡
Everyone... Farewell...
Hey.
[Shinpachi and Kondo take on the Yagyu clan to bring back Otae who is marrying Kyubei.]
[Gintoki and his friends rush to the scene! Can they win against the Yagyu clan?]
(輿矩)九兵衛よ お前には失望したぞ｡
Kyubei, I'm disappointed in you.
武者修行の旅に出たのは➡
I sent you on your journey
この柳生陳陰流の道を 極めるためと思っておったのが…｡
to train in the martial arts so that you could perfect our Yagyu Chingage style of swordsmanship.
突然 帰ってきたと思えば あのような娘を連れ帰り➡
Now you return all of a sudden with that girl and tell me you want to marry her?
嫁にしたい？ ３年間 何をやっていた？
What were you doing these past three years?
嫁探しか？
Searching for a wife?!
With all due respect, Father...
(九兵衛)お言葉ですが 父上｡ (輿矩)黙れ！
Silence! I don't want you calling me "Father"!
お前に父上などと呼ばれたくない｡
I told you to call me "Papa"! "Daddy" is okay, too!
ﾊﾟﾊﾟと呼べと言っただろうが！
もしくは ﾀﾞﾃﾞｨでも可！
Kyubei, our Yagyu clan
九兵衛よ 我が柳生家は➡
将軍家に 代々 お仕えしてきた生粋のｾﾚﾌﾞ｡
is made of trueborn celebrities who have served the Shogun's family for generations.
柳生の剣と ｾﾚﾌﾞの血を 絶やすことなく残していくのが➡
Our duty is to continue the Yagyu style of swordsmanship and keep our celebrity blood intact.
我らが使命｡
ﾊﾟﾊﾟだってなぁ ﾎﾝﾄは こんなﾍﾟﾙｼｬ猫とか嫌いなんだぞ｡
Look at me-the truth is, I hate Persian cats.
ｱﾚﾙｷﾞｰだからな｡
I'm allergic to them. But I put up with them because I'm a celebrity.
でも ｾﾚﾌﾞだから 我慢してたんだよ これ｡
お妙ちゃんは確かに かわいい｡
Otae-chan is certainly cute.
だが ただの町道場の娘と 柳生家の跡取り｡
But she's a mere daughter of a town dojo, and you're the successor to the Yagyu clan.
That's not balance.
つりあいが とれるわけあるまい｡
お前は ｾﾚﾌﾞの血を ここで途絶えさせるつもりか？
Is it your intention to end our celebrity bloodline right here?
おい 九兵衛 話は まだ終わっとらんぞ！
Just a minute, Kyubei! I'm not done yet.
(九兵衛)人は何かを守るために 強くなるもの｡
People grow strong in order to protect something.
You can go on protecting what you want to protect, Papa.
ﾊﾟﾊﾟ上は ﾊﾟﾊﾟ上の守りたいものを守ればいい｡
ﾎﾞｸは ﾎﾞｸの大切な人を守る｡
I will protect the person I cherish.
I made a vow on this left eye I lost...
この失った左目に誓ったんだ｡
Hey! Just a minute, Kyubei!
(輿矩)おい待て 九兵衛！
Koshinori-sama!
(門下生)輿矩様～！
What is it?
何事だ？
(門下生)うがぁ～！
Shinpachi!
新八！ こんなﾏﾈする前に なんで ひと言 言わなかった!?
Why didn't you at least say something before doing something like this?!
(神楽)１人で こんな おもしろそうなこと➡
Planning to do something this much fun all by yourself!
ｼｺｼｺ計画して！ お前は もう今日から ｼｺｯ八な！
From now on, I'm calling you Sneakypachi!
Don't you guys understand that Shinpachi-kun didn't want to get you involved?!
(近藤)ｷｻﾏら 新八君はみんなを➡
巻き込みたくなかった というのがわからんか！
うるせえ ｺﾞﾘﾗ！
Shut up, Gorilla! Then why are you involved in this?
じゃ なんで お前は巻き込まれてるんだ!?
Because of my ego!
ｺｲﾂは ｵﾚたちのｴｺﾞだからよ｡
Otae-san is marrying into this clan by choice!
お妙さんは自ら望んで ここへ嫁ごうとしている｡
I don't know her reasons, but...
理由は知らん｡ だが あんな顔でさよならなんて➡
there's no way she'd say good-bye with that face!
できるわけもねえ！
こんなこと お妙さんは 望んでないのかもしれん｡
Maybe this isn't what Otae-san wants!
Only people who have a bone to pick, are supposed to be here.
それでも 自分の我を 通したいﾔﾂだけがここへ来た！
There's no duty or anything here.
大儀もｸｿもない戦いに➡
I can't have people who have nothing to do with this getting involved!
余計なﾔﾂ 巻き込むわけには いかんだろうが！
So why are you guys here?!
なのに なんで お前らまで来るのかなぁ もう！
(土方)近藤さん 心配いらねえよ｡
Kondo-san, you don't have to worry.
I came with a bone to pick, too.
ｵﾚも我 通しに来ただけだ｡
I owe the Yagyu, so I came to pay them back.
柳生には借りがある｡ ｿｲﾂを返しにきただけさ｡
ちなみに今日は仕事も休みだし➡
Just so you know, today's my day off, so you don't have to be concerned about that.
そこんとこも心配いらねえ｡
Kondo-san, I just came because I have a bone to pick, too.
(沖田)近藤さん ｵﾚも我 通しに来ただけでさぁ｡
このままいけば ｺﾞﾘﾗを姐さんと 呼ばなきゃいけなくなる｡
At this rate, I'll have to call a gorilla our missus.
ちなみに今日は ﾊﾞﾘﾊﾞﾘ仕事でしたが さぼってきやした｡
Just so you know, I was supposed to work really hard today, but I took the day off.
(近藤)ｵﾒｴは ﾎﾝﾄに我だな！
You're all about yourself!
What're you talking about? You took today off, too, Kondo-san.
なんでぇ 近藤さんだって さぼりのくせに｡
(近藤)ちゃんと 有給とってきました！
I took paid leave.
Gin-san...
(新八)銀さん ﾎﾞｸね…➡
I don't care anymore if people say I have a sister complex.
もう ｼｽｺﾝと呼ばれてもいいです｡
ﾎﾞｸは 姉上が大好きですよ｡
I love my sister. I don't want her to leave.
離れるのはｲﾔだ｡ できることなら ずっと一緒にいたいです｡
If there were any way to do it, I'd want to stay with her forever. But...
でもね 姉上が 心底惚れて連れてきた人なら➡
If he's the person she loves from the bottom of her heart,
even if he's a shady bastard who never has money...
たとえ それが 万年金欠のうさんくさい男でも➡
ｺﾞﾘﾗのｽﾄｰｶｰでも ﾏﾖﾗｰでも ﾄﾞＳでも➡
or if he's a gorilla stalker...
or a mayo maniac or a hardcore sadist...
姉上が幸せになれるのなら➡
If Sis can be happy, then I'm prepared to send her off as I cry...
泣きながらでも 送り出す覚悟はできてるんだ｡
But...
でも 泣いてる姉上を 見送るなんてﾏﾈは➡
to send Sis off with tears in her eyes...
まっぴら御免こうむります！
I'd die before I let that happen.
…ﾎﾞｸは 姉上には いつも笑っていてほしいんです｡
I want Sis to always be smiling.
(神楽)銀ちゃん ｱﾈｺﾞが ほんとに➡
Gin-chan? What'll happen if Big Sis really does love that shrimp?
あのﾁﾋﾞに惚れてたら どうなるね？ 私たち完全に悪役ｱﾙ｡
We'd be total jerks.
悪役には慣れてるだろう？ 人のｼﾞｬﾏするのもな｡
We're used to being jerks...and getting in people's way.
新八 覚えておけよ｡
Shinpachi, remember this:
ｵﾚたちは正義の味方でも➡
We're not doing this for justice or for your sister.
ﾃﾒｴの姉ちゃんの味方でもねえよ｡
ﾃﾒｴの味方だ｡
We're doing it for you.
Let me make it clear. I'm not on your side.
(土方)言っとくが ｵﾚは味方じゃねえぞ｡
It's just that we share the same enemy.
たまたま ｹﾝｶ相手が一緒なだけだ｡
Isn't he stereotypical? He thinks he's Vegeta.
[Note: Refers to Vegeta from Dragonball.]
(沖田)ﾍﾞﾀじゃない？ ﾍﾞｼﾞｰﾀ気取りでさ➡
He's planning on casually joining in.
あのまま さりげなく 仲間になるつもりだぜ｡
We're far from being comrades, but with this group,
(近藤)仲間とは程遠いが➡
この６人なら 天下の柳生にも 勝てるやもしれん｡
we just might be able to beat the Yagyu.
いくか 義弟よ！
Shall we go, brother?
…誰が義弟？
Who're you calling "brother"?
["Yesterday's Enemy, After All Is Said and Done, Is Still the Enemy"]
(北大路)聞いたか？ 若の連れてきた あの娘➡
Did you hear?
That girl the Young Lord brought back
花嫁修業とかで ｵﾊﾞﾊﾞに しごかれてるとか｡
is getting run through the mill by Granny as part of her bride training.
(南戸)残念… そりゃ 逃げ出すのも時間の問題だねぇ｡
A pity. It's only a matter of time before she runs away.
結構 好みだったのに｡
She was my type, too.
っていうか北大路 ｵﾒｴ ｹﾁｬｯﾌﾟ かけすぎじゃねえ？
Hey, Kitaoji,
aren't you using too much ketchup?
(北大路)知らんのか？
Don't you know?
Ketchup was created to go well with everything.
ｹﾁｬｯﾌﾟは 何にでも合うように 作られているんだ｡
(南戸)胸ｸｿ悪くなる やめろ｡
You're making me sick. Stop it.
Looking at your dick-face makes me sicker.
ｵﾚは貴様の その男性器のような ﾂﾗを見ているほうが➡
気分が悪くなる｡ なんだと！
What?!
(西野)やめろ 北大路 南戸！ まったく お前たちは幼稚な｡
Stop it, Kitaoji, Minamito. You're acting like kids.
いい歳こいて お子様ﾗﾝﾁ食ってるﾔﾂに➡
I don't have to take that from a guy who eats a kiddie meal lunch at his age!
言われたくねえんだけど！
Shut up, dick-face!
黙れ この顔面男性器が！ だから どのへん!?
What part?! What part looks like a dick?!
どのへん男性器!? (東城)やめなさい｡
Stop it.
(東城)食べ物くらいであさましい｡ しかし花嫁とは…｡
It's just food. You're disgraceful...
A bride, is it?
(東城)３年もの武者修行の旅も➡
Seems three years on a martial arts training journey didn't change the Young Lord.
若を変えるには至らなんだか…｡
ﾁｸｼｮ～!! (南戸)東城さん!?
Dammit!
Tojo-san?
Damn Granny!
ｵﾊﾞﾊﾞの野郎！ 新鮮な卵 仕入れとけって言っただろうが！
I told her to stock up on fresh eggs!
また黄身が崩れたぞ ちょっと ｽｰﾊﾟｰいってくる！
The yolk broke again! I'm going to the supermarket!
(南戸)落ち着いてください 東城さん 食べ物くらいで｡
Calm down, Tojo-san! It's just food!
(東城)うるせえ 全身男性器!!
Shut up! Dick bod!
Now it's my entire body?! Looks like this is getting worse!
(南戸)全身!? なんか どんどん 侵食が進んでるんですけど！
(みんな)ﾊｯ…！
おい 股から卵たれてるぜ｡
Hey, you're dripping egg from your crotch. Are you ovulating?
排卵日か？
(神楽)うおぉぉ!!
今のは総悟が悪い｡
You deserved that, Sogo.
Ouch! What was that for?!
痛ぇ… なにしやが…｡
Well, nice of you to come, dojo busters.
(東城)いやぁ よくきてくれましたね➡
道場破りさん｡ しかし 快進撃もここまで｡
But your remarkable ride ends here.
我ら 柳生家の守護を つかさどる…｡
We are the guardians of the Yagyu clan...
Itsuki Kitaoji.
北大路 斎｡
南戸 粋｡
Sui Minamito.
西野 掴｡
Tsukamu Nishino.
そして 東城 歩｡
And Ayumu Tojo.
柳生四天王と対峙したからには➡
Now that you face the Four Yagyu Aces, don't expect to leave here alive.
ここから生きて出られると 思いますな｡
あぁん!? ﾃﾒｴらみてえなもんに 用は ねえんだよ｡
We don't have business with you.
大将出せ こら！ なんだﾃﾒｴら!!
Bring out your leader. Who are you guys?
どこの100ﾊﾟｰｾﾝﾄだ！ 何100ﾊﾟｰｾﾝﾄだ!!
Whose 100 percent are you? What 100 percent are you?
柳生100ﾊﾟｰｾﾝﾄか この野郎！
Are you 100 percent Yagyu?! You bastards!
[Note: Spoof of Strawberry 100%. Based on the Four Yagyu Aces' last names.]
We can't let small fry like you meet the Young Lord.
ｱﾝﾀらのようなｻﾞｺ 若に会わせられるわけねえだろう｡
刀捨てな 人質が…｡
Throw down your swords! Or our hostage...
(銀時たち)うおりゃ～!!
(みんな)ぎゃあ～っ！
What's the hell are you doing?!
ちょっと 何してんの？ 捨てろって言うから｡
You said throw them down.
What kind of way is that to throw them down?!
(南戸)どんな捨て方 人質が見えねえのか！
Can't you see we have a hostage?!
Sorry, but he's got no value as a hostage.
残念だが ｿｲﾂに 人質の価値はねえ｡
Kill him! Kill him!
殺せよ 殺せよ ｸﾞﾊﾊｯ｡
You'll regret this later.
(沖田)ﾃﾒｴら あとで 覚えてろぃ｡
Tojo-dono, let me take care of these guys...
東城殿｡ こﾔﾂらの始末 俺に…｡
(九兵衛)やめろ｡
Stop it!
(九兵衛)それは ﾎﾞｸの妻の親族だ｡ 手荒なﾏﾈは よせ｡
They are relatives of my wife. No rough stuff.
(北大路/南戸/西野/東城)若っ！
Young Lord!
You come in droves... Shinpachi-kun.
(九兵衛)まあ ぞろぞろと｡
(九兵衛)新八君 ｷﾐの姉への執着が ここまで強いとは思わなかった｡
I didn't think your attachment to your sister was this strong.
今日は 弟としてではない｡ 恒道館の主として来た｡
I didn't come today as her brother. I came as the head of Kodokan.
志村 妙は 当道場の 大切な門弟である｡
Tae Shimura is a valuable member of our dojo.
これを もらいたいのであれば➡
If you wish for her as your wife, decorum dictates that you come through me.
主であるﾎﾞｸに 話を通すのが筋｡
話？ 何の話だ？
Decorum? What're you talking about?
As one who lives for the study of swordsmanship, you should understand.
同じく 剣を学び 生きる身なら わかるだろう｡
侍は 口で語るより 剣で語るほうが早い｡
Samurai settle matters faster with the sword than with words.
剣に生き 剣に死ぬのが 侍ってもんでさぁ ならば…｡
A samurai lives by the sword and dies by the sword. That being the case...
女も剣で奪っていけよ｡
Take the woman with your sword.
私たちと勝負しろ このﾔﾛｳ！
We want a match with you, you bastard!
A match?
勝負？ 我が柳生流とｷﾐたちの ｵﾝﾎﾞﾛ道場で➡
Do you think a match between our Yagyu dojo and your pathetic dojo would even be a fight?
勝負になると思っているのか？
Oh it will, sonny.
なりますよ 坊ちゃま｡ ﾎﾞｸら恒道館のﾒﾝﾊﾞｰは➡
The truth is, we members of the Kodokan don't get along at all,
実は とっても仲が悪くて➡
ﾌﾟﾗｲﾍﾞｰﾄとか 一切付き合いなくて➡
and don't socialize outside of the dojo.
We don't know anything about each other,
お互いのこと 全然知らなくて ていうか知りたくもねえし➡
and we don't want to. We'd rather see each other die.
死ねばいいと 思ってるんですけどもね｡
But I do know that we're all very strong.
お互い 強いことだけは 知ってるんです｡
Otae-dono, what is this?
(お滝)お妙殿 これは 何ですか？
Omelet.
卵焼きです｡
Omelets have always been one of my best dishes.
卵焼きは 昔から得意なんです｡ もう極めたって➡
I thought I had already perfected it,
思ってたんですけど お滝さんの 言うとおり改良したら➡
but I did as you asked, Otaki-san, and improved it.
こんなに ﾚﾊﾟｰﾄﾘｰが増えちゃって｡
My repertoire has grown by this much...
うちのｷｯﾁﾝは 爆心地か！
Is our kitchen ground zero?
そうですね｡ 若妻にしたら 厨房は戦場ですもの｡
Yes, to an inexperienced wife, the kitchen is a battlefield.
That's not what I meant! These are completely burnt!
(お滝)そういうんじゃなくて これ 丸こげ 黒一色｡
ｿｳﾙｿｻｴﾃｨ!? ここはｿｳﾙｿｻｴﾃｨ!?
Everything's black! A soul society?! Is this a soul society?!
[Note: Refers to BLEACH. At the Soul society, soul reapers all wear black kimono.]
If you can't cook even a single dish,
料理のひとつも作れないで 柳生家に嫁ごうなんて➡
it'll be a hundred years before you can marry into the Yagyu clan!
100年早いわ！
お滝さん｡ 仮にも花嫁教育係が➡
Otaki-san, don't you think it's rather rude for the person
星 一徹ｸﾗｯｼｭをしたり 殴りかかってきたり➡
in charge of training the new wife to strike her student?
ぶしつけじゃなくて？
Young lady! You're not fazed even a bit by my hazing! You are a frightening one!
《小娘｡ このｵﾊﾞﾊﾞのいびりを ものともせんとは 末恐ろしい｡
このまま この娘が 柳生家に嫁げば➡
If this woman marries into the Yagyu clan,
間違いなく このｵﾊﾞﾊﾞの脅威になろうぞ》
she will most certainly be a threat to me!
もう いいです｡ ほとほと あなたには あきれました｡
Forget it. I'm appalled by you!
(お滝)そこのｺﾞﾐ 片しておきなさい｡
Clean up that mess.
捨ててはいけませんよ｡
You mustn't throw it away. Make sure you eat it all.
責任を持って あなたが食べなされ｡
犬のｴｻが あなたには お似合いですよ｡
Dog food matches you well.
Grandfather, that's supposed to be for the dog.
おじいさま 犬のｴｻらしいですよ｡
[Note: Binbokusai literally means "dirt poor."]
Binbokusai-sama! What're you eating?!
敏木斎様 何食ってんですか あんた！
(敏木斎)もったいねえよ これ まだ食えるぜ これ｡
It's such a waste! It's still edible.
(お滝)食える食えないじゃなくて 柳生の頂点が何やってんのぉ！
Edible, inedible is not the point!
The head of the Yagyu should not be doing such things!
You people barged in here. You'll have to follow Yagyu rules.
ｷﾐたちのほうから 押しかけてきたんだ｡
ﾙｰﾙは 柳生流に従ってもらう｡
You want to play Othello?
ｵｾﾛでもやろうってのか｡
Just so you know, we're really good at Othello.
言っとくけど ｵｾﾛ強えぞ｡ 四つ角 全部取るぞ！
We'll take all four corners.
(九兵衛)ここに 皿がある｡
We have plates here.
この皿を おのおの 体のどこかに つけ 互いにこれを割り合う｡
Each of us will wear these plates somewhere on our bodies and try to break each other's plates.
(九兵衛)人数は ６対６➡
It'll be six versus six.
The battlefield will be the entirety of the Yagyu premises.
戦いの場は 柳生の敷地内すべてだ｡
皿を割られた者から ｹﾞｰﾑから脱落し➡
Those whose plates are broken must drop out of the game.
大将の皿を割ったほうが勝利｡ それだけだ｡
The side that breaks the captain's plate wins.
Those are the only rules.
ｷﾐたちの誇る 実戦剣法とやらを➡
We will beat that street-style swordsmanship of yours to a pulp
完膚なきまでに 叩き潰して➡
すべての未練を 断ち切ってやる！
and put an end to any second thoughts.
That's fine with us, you bastards. We won't lose a fight.
上等だよ この野郎！ ｹﾝｶなら負けねえぞ！
我々の大将は この屋敷の どこかにいる｡
Our captain is somewhere in this mansion.
それさえ倒せば ｷﾐたちの勝ちだ｡
Defeat him, and you win.
By the way, we're not telling you who it is.
ちなみに 誰かは教えません｡
(東城)まぁ 我々は 皿を すべて割るつもりなので➡
We intend to break all your plates, so it doesn't matter who our captain is.
大将が誰でも関係ありませんがね｡
(銀時たち)なんだと こらぁ！
What the hell is this?!
I'm really angry! I'm not letting those guys have Otae-san!
この野郎！ 腹立つんですけどっ！
あんなﾔﾂに 絶対 お妙さんは やれん！
She was never yours, either.
いや ｱﾝﾀのものでも ないんですけど｡
もう ﾑｶつくからさぁ➡
That pisses me off! Let's play with our captain out in the open!
こっちも 大将 むき出しでいこうぜ！
(近藤)いつやられても ＯＫみたいな感じで！
So they can get him at any time!
ＯＫじゃないっすよ！ 一発ＫＯですよ そんなとこ！
That's not okay! He'd be KO'ed with one blow!
ってか ﾎﾞｸが大将!?
You're making me the captain?!
Naturally.
当たりめえだろ｡ 不本意だが➡
It's not how we wanted it, but we've become Kodokan students.
ｵﾚたちは 恒道館の 門弟ってことになってるんだ｡
You don't have to worry!
心配いらんぞ！ 新八君は ｵﾚが命を張って守る！
I'll protect Shinpachi-kun with my life! Besides,
いろいろ 話したいことも あるしなぁ！
we have a lot to talk about.
Will she live with me, or will I live at your place?
ｳﾁに住むか ｵﾚがそっちに住むか｡
Excuse me! Choose someone else!
すみませ～ん！ 誰か 他の人にしてくださ～い！
More importantly, where is everyone going to wear their plates?
んなことより 皆さん どこに皿つけんでぃ｡
土方さんは 負けるつもり 一切ないんで➡
Since Hijikata-san has no intention of losing, he's going to wear his on his eye.
眼球につけるらしいです｡
You trying to get my eye gouged out?!
眼球えぐり出されてえのか ﾃﾒｴは｡
Whether you worry or not, it's going to break when the time comes!
ｸﾞﾀﾞｸﾞﾀﾞ考えても 割れるときは 割れるんだよ！
適当に貼っとけ 適当に｡
Just place them wherever.
よしっ！ ｵﾚはここにしよう｡ だから なんでｵﾚだっ！
I'll place mine here.
Why on me?!
ﾃﾒｴの皿だろうがっ！
It's your plate!
If it's only one eye, you'll be the same as that other character!
片目だけだと 向こうと ｷｬﾗがかぶるだろうが！
Couldn't you figure that out?
空気 読め！ 読んでみろ 土方｡
Think, Hijikata! You can do it, Hijikata!
お前なら 読めるはずだ 土方｡ (土方)黙っとけや！ ﾄﾞＳｺﾝﾋﾞ！
Shut up you sadist duo!
(神楽)銀ちゃ～ん！ (みんな)あん？
Gin-chan!
I have a great idea! I'll put it under my foot!
すごいこと 考えたｱﾙ！ 足の裏 これ➡
歩いてたら見えなくね？ すごくね？
They can't see it when I walk! Isn't that awesome? They'll never figure it out!
これなら 絶対 気づかれないｱﾙ！
(皿の割れる音)
痛～ なんか踏んだｱﾙ｡ 切れたｱﾙ 足｡
Ouch! I stepped on something. I cut my foot.
You can't fool us! What have you done?!
ごまかしてんじゃねえ！ お前なにしてんだっ！
勝負する前に 皿割って！
You crushed the plate before the match even began!
What'll we do about this? What'll we do?!
どうすんだ これっ！ どうすんだ これっ！
Go get a replacement!
ちょっと 取り替えてこい！ 柳生の人に言って➡
Go to someone at the Yagyu household and get a replacement!
替えてもらってこい！ 待てっ！
Wait. We don't know what the enemy is planning.
敵の作戦が わからねえ以上 単独行動は 危険だ｡
It's dangerous to move about alone. We'll form pairs.
２人ずつ 組んで…｡ 土方さん！
Hijikata-san.
The hardcore sadist duo went off by themselves.
ﾄﾞＳｺﾝﾋﾞ 勝手に ｶﾞﾝｶﾞﾝ行っちゃいました｡
(土方)すみませ～ん！
Excuse me...
ちょっと お皿 貸してもらえますか？
Mind if we borrow a plate for a while?
(お女中)あら 宴会でもやるのかい？
Are you throwing a party?
(土方)まぁ そんなとこです｡
You might say so.
Here...
(お女中)はい｡
Here. Use this.
ほら これ使え｡ ｲﾔｱﾙ 醤油ついてるね｡
No. It's got soy sauce on it.
(土方)じゃあ ｵﾚが醤油皿使うから お前は ｵﾚの皿使え｡
All right, I'll use the one with soy sauce on it. You use mine.
(神楽)ｲﾔｱﾙ！ ﾏﾖﾈｰｽﾞついてるね｡
I don't want to. It has mayo on it.
ついてねえよ！ いいかげんにしろ!!
No, it doesn't.
Cut it out! This all started because of you...
もとはといえば…｡ あっ 私 あの皿がいいｱﾙ｡
I like that plate!
えっ… あんな でけえ皿 しょって どうやって戦う気だ！
How do you plan on fighting while carrying that huge plate?
あれじゃなきゃ ｲﾔｱﾙ｡
It has to be that plate.
You want me to smash your mayo plate to bits, too?
お前の ﾏﾖ皿も 粉々にされたいｱﾙか？
…ﾃﾒｴは！
You...
んっ… あっ！ あ？
(土方)開戦の のろし！
The signal to start...
おい！ ﾓﾀﾓﾀしてるﾋﾏは…！
Hey! There's no time to be dawdling...
しようがないｱﾙな ﾏﾖ皿で ｶﾞﾏﾝするｱﾙか｡
Guess I have no choice but to settle for the mayo plate.
ちょっ… 待て！ ｵﾚの皿は…！
Just a minute...
Wait! My plate...
Okay, she'll be first.
はい まず１人目！
Deeper...deeper...all the way...
(敏木斎)あへぇ もっと奥！ もっと そうｸﾞｰｯと！
あっは～ん 奥まで～ あへぇ～!!
(お妙)おじいさま ｾｸﾊﾗは やめてください｡
Grandfather, please stop sexually harassing me.
(敏木斎)しかし九兵衛と遊んでた あの ちんこいのが➡
To think that the little girl who played with Kyubei is coming here as his bride...
ｳﾁに嫁いでくるとはのぅ｡
(敏木斎)あっ もうちょい奥 ｷﾞﾘｷﾞﾘまでいっちゃって…｡
A little deeper...as far as you can go...
そんなに奥深くほじったら➡
If I dig any deeper, I might dig out something very important.
大切なものまで 出てきちゃいますよ｡ ん？
お妙君は 昔からﾆｺﾆｺ笑ってばかりで➡
As long as I've known you, Otae-kun, you've always been smiling,
本当の気持が読めんからの｡
so it's difficult to know what you're thinking.
言っちゃいなよ な～んか 隠し…｡
It's as if you're hiding something...
I'm not hiding anything! I didn't see anything!
隠してません！ 私… なんにも見てません！
Is...that so?
え… あ… そう？
(敏木斎)俺ぁ てっきり まだ あのことを➡
I just can't help but think you're still bothered by that time...
気にしてんじゃねえかって｡
それならいい｡ ｲﾊﾞﾗの道になるやもしれんが➡
If not, then that's fine.
It might be a thorny path ahead, but I'm rooting for you two young ones.
俺ぁ 若い２人を応援するぜ｡
おじい様？ どこへ？
Where are you going, Grandfather?
(敏木斎)ちと うるさい連中が 来とるようでなぁ｡
Seems we have some rowdy visitors.
ちょっくら 行ってくらぁ｡
I have to go.
Tsk... I missed the plate.
(西野)ちっ！ 皿は仕損じたか｡
(北大路)だが 我らの 連続技からは 逃れられぬぞ！
However...
You cannot escape...
our combo...!
うっ！ (沖田)おい！
Hey.
I'm going to get that girl.
その娘やんなぁ 俺でぃ｡
Minamito!
南戸！ ん？ うっ！
Owie...
(神楽)いてて…｡
Hijikata-san...what is that? That huge target?
(沖田)土方さん… なんですかぃ？ そのﾃﾞｶｲ的は？
ﾊﾝﾃﾞだ｡
A handicap.
(南戸)うぅ… ｡
Hey Kitaoji. How's my face look?
おい 北大路｡ 俺は今 どんなﾂﾗしてるよ？
男性器のようなﾂﾗをしている｡
Like a dick.
ｹｶﾞの具合だよ｡ 血まみれだ｡
I was talking about my injuries.
It's covered with blood. Better hurry to your urologist.
泌尿器科へ急げ｡ そっちの話から離れろ！
Get off of that!
(南戸)お～ やっぱいい男は 血 流しても様になら～｡
Oh...
A handsome guy looks good even when he's bleeding.
(南戸)ｵｲ！ 西野｡ お前も来て一緒に写真に写れ｡
Hey Nishino, come here. Join us for a photo.
まったくお前は｡ また 幼稚な｡
Geez... You're such a kid.
(南戸)記念だよ｡ 俺たちが➡
It's a souvenir. It's not that often we get injured.
ｹｶﾞを負わせられるなんざ そうねえぞ｡
これｶｯｺよくね？ 血 ｶｯｺよくね？
Doesn't it look cool? Having blood on my face.
(北大路)なかなか おもしろい 戦いになりそうじゃねえか｡
This is turning into a very interesting fight.
(南戸)何ﾒｲﾝで写ってんだよ！
Why are you guys shooting in main frame?
It didn't work at all. Didn't even break the plate.
(神楽)全然効いてないね｡ 皿も割れてないね｡
(神楽)万事屋ﾄﾘｵなら しとめてたｱﾙ｡
If I'd been with the Odd Jobs trio, we'd have finished them off.
ﾎｰﾑｼｯｸか？ ﾃﾒｴも やられそうに なってたくせに｡
Feeling homesick?
You were almost defeated?
総悟！ 万事屋の野郎はどうした？
Sogo, what happened to the Odd Jobs?
旦那なら１人でも大丈夫でしょう｡
He'll be fine by himself.
お前！ 銀ちゃん１人で 置いてきたｱﾙか！
You left Gin-chan alone?!
私… 銀ちゃん探すね！
I'm going to find Gin-chan!
銀ちゃん あぁ見えて 寂しがり屋なんだぞ！
Gin-chan doesn't look it, but he gets lonely!
寂しがり屋はお前だろ！ 勝手に動くな！
Hey! You're the lonely one! Don't move around by yourself!
Wait up, young lady.
まぁ 待たれい お嬢さん｡ どのみち 全員討ち取られるんだ｡
You'll all be defeated anyway. Doesn't matter if you help him...
助けに行こうと同じこと…｡ あぁっ！
邪魔すんじゃねえよ｡ お前らの相手は➡
Get out of my way!
Those two idiots over there will be your opponents.
あそこのﾊﾞｶ２人が務めるね｡ ｶﾞｷどもはﾁｬﾝﾊﾞﾗやってな｡
You kids can play swordfight together.
気に入った！ その鬼神の如き力 ぬしの相手 この西野 掴が➡
I like you! And that demon-like strength of yours!
I, Tsukamu Nishino, will be your opponent.
あいつかまつる！ おいっ！
Hey!
(北大路)ｱﾝﾀはこっちだ｡ 真選組の鬼副長さん｡
Your opponent is over here...
The Demon Vice-Chief of the Shinsengumi.
本物の侍がなんたるか➡
I, Itsuki Kitaoji, will show you what a real samurai is.
この北大路 斎が教えてやろう｡
上等だ｡
Suits me just fine.
ほいじゃ ｱﾝﾀを俺かぃ 南戸 粋だ｡
That leaves you for me. I'm Sui Minamido.
どうだい？ 兄ちゃん 俺たちは ﾂﾗへの攻撃はﾅｼにしねえか？
What do you say, young man?
Let's say no attacks to the face.
お互い泣く女がいるだろう｡
We both have women who'd cry if something happened, right?
心配いらねえよ｡ ｱﾝﾀらｾﾚﾌﾞと違って➡
Don't worry about that.
Unlike you celebrities, we country samurai aren't popular with women.
芋侍は 女に縁がねえ｡
ｵｲｵｲ｡ ｱﾝﾀのためを思って 言ってんだぜ？
Oh come on, I was trying to help you out.
Shut up. I get it.
うるせえな わ～ったよ｡ じゃあ ﾂﾗ以外➡
If it's not your face, I can mess you up as much as I want.
ﾑﾁｬｸﾁｬにしても いいんだな？
それじゃ勝てねえよ｡ 皿 割らねえと｡
You won't win that way. You have to break the plate.
(南戸)なっ…｡
What?
I didn't come here to break plates.
(沖田)ｵﾚは皿を 割りにきたんじゃねえ…｡
ﾃﾒｴらの鼻 へし折りにきただけだ｡
I came to beat you people to a pulp.
(沖田)ﾊｯ ﾊｯ ﾊｯ…！
ﾊｱｯ!! うあっ！
♪♪～
《南戸:ﾊﾞｶな… この男 ﾊﾞｶ強え！》
This...can't be...
This guy is ridiculously strong!
(沖田)ﾌｰﾝ ここに隠してたのか｡
Oh, so this is where you were hiding it.
《南戸:しかも…》
And what's more...
I have to beat you so I don't hit your face or the plate.
ﾂﾗと皿だけは傷つけねえように 殴らねえとな｡
《南戸:ﾄﾞＳだっ！》
He's a hardcore sadist!
うおぉぉ！
(沖田)ぐほっ…｡
Minamito, why're you struggling with that kid?
南戸！ ｶﾞｷ相手に なにをしている！
いや… あのｶﾞｷ やべえぞ｡
That kid is dangerous...
なにしてんだ ﾃﾒｴは｡
What's the problem? He's no match for you.
あんなのに やられるﾀﾏかよ おい｡
うるさいｱﾙ なんか調子悪いね｡
Shut up! I'm not feeling well.
(沖田)おい お前 その手…｡
Hey, your arm...
ﾌﾝ！ 皿をかばうあまり 利き腕を失ったか｡
You lost the use of your arm when you were protecting the plate...
反対に戻せば治るんじゃ？ (西野)ちょっと！
Bending it back the opposite way should fix it.
あんまり いじくらないほうが いいんじゃ…｡
Just a minute! I don't think you should do that...
ぎゃあ～！
Huh? Did I bend it the wrong way?
方向 間違ったか？ (神楽)この…！
Why you...
なにすんだ ｸｿｶﾞｷｰ！
What'd you do that for, you damn brat!
うわぁぁぁ～！
You broke it! I heard it snap!
折れた～！ ﾎﾟｷｯつった～！ 痛い！
Damn you! Most people don't kick hard enough to break bones!
ﾃﾒｴ！ 普通 折れるまでやるか！
やられたら倍返ししろって 銀ちゃんにいわれてるね｡
Gin-chan says "an eye for an eye."
(西野)もはや勝負あったな｡
This match is done.
仲間割れで勝機を逃すなど 愚の骨頂｡
It's the ultimate stupidity to let the match get away because of infighting...
Hand over your plates.
(西野)皿を渡せ！ ﾔﾀﾞﾈ！
No way!
(西野)ﾌｯ!!
It's useless. Samurai who can't use their arm or their leg are useless.
ﾑﾀﾞだ！ 腕と足が使えぬ侍など 役には立たぬ｡
Samurai should face their end with grace.
武士の最期は潔くあるもんだ｡
Hmph.
(沖田)ﾌｯ 潔く？ あいにくｵﾚたち芋侍は➡
With grace?
Unfortunately, we country samurai don't subscribe to that sort of Bushido.
そんな武士道 持ち合わせちゃねえや｡
手と足が使えねえ侍か…｡
So we're samurai who can't use an arm and a leg...
おい ｵﾚと組むのと ｱﾚに負けるの どっちがｲﾔだ？
Hey, which do you hate more: teaming up with me or losing to them?
Both of you can go to hell.
どっちもｸｿくらえｱﾙ｡
ｵﾚもｸｿくらえでぇ｡
I feel the same way.
But...
でも やられたら倍にして返せって 銀ちゃんにいわれてるね｡
Gin-chan says to give back double what people do to you.
(西野)出てこい！ 芋侍が！
Come on out, country samurai!
We're over here, big stuff.
(沖田)こっちだぜ ﾃﾞｶﾌﾞﾂ｡ (西野)ん？
Let's have our final match.
最後の勝負といこうじゃねえかい｡
かかってきやがれ～！
Bring it on!
なにしてんの？ 足が使えねえﾔﾂ➡
What's with that?
I can't use my leg; she can't use her arm. But if we cooperate...
腕が使えねえﾔﾂ 協力すれば…｡ ｵｲ！
Hey! Don't put your crotch so close to me! It's sickening!
あんまり 股近づけるな！ 気分悪い｡
しかたねえだろう｡
I can't help it!
ﾊｯﾊｯﾊ！ そんな状態で 拙者の太刀をかわせる と？
You think you can dodge my sword like that?!
(沖田)めちゃくちゃ軽快に 動けるっつうの！
We're incredibly light on our feet. Shall we do a tap dance for you?
なんなら ﾀｯﾌﾟでも ふんでやろうか あぁ!?
I can't tap.
(神楽)ﾀｯﾌﾟは ﾑﾘｱﾙ！
She says she can't tap dance, dammit!
(沖田)ﾀｯﾌﾟは ﾑﾘだそうだ この野郎！
I don't have time to play kiddy games!
ｶﾞｷの遊びに つきあっている ﾋﾏはない!!
うぉぉ！
(西野)おい！ よけてるのは 下のﾔﾂだけで➡
Hey!
The bottom's doing all the dodging, but the top's taking all the hits!
上のﾔﾂ 全部当たってるぞ!!
ﾌﾝ！ たあいもない!!
Time out!
うっ… なっ！
ﾌﾝ このときを待っていたぜ！
Hmph.
I was waiting for that.
ﾊﾞ ﾊﾞｶな！ すべて計算で!?
This can't be! He planned this?!
(沖田)いけぇ～！ (神楽)うおぉぉ!!
Now!
うがっ！
(神楽)ああっ！ (沖田)あ…｡
ﾜｰｯﾊｯﾊ！ 策士 策に溺れるとは このことよ!!
The strategist is beaten by his own strategy!
(神楽)ぬうぅぅ…！ (西野)おっ…｡
ほわたぁぁ～！
ぐぐっ…｡
[To be continued]
[The next episode...]
[Toshiro Hijikata vs. Itsuki Kitaoji]
"People who are picky about food are picky about people, too."
[The battle between Kodokan and the Yagyu clan continues. Next time, it's Hijikata vs. Kitaoji-mayonnaise against ketchup.]
[Will mayonnaise win? Or will ketchup? And where did Gintoki disappear to?]