[Sagaru Yamazaki] [Note: Parody of Prince of Tennis.]
GinTama...
[Right after these messages!]
Right after these messages!
You're not there yet.
[Note: Ryoma's favorite phrase from Prince of Tennis]
[Amazingly, June 26th is Katsura's birthday. So this month is Katsura Enrichment Month.]
[Kotaro Katsura, 2X years old. Why not have adults like this?]
Hey, did you hear? Takasugi fought with the Shinsengumi.
(攘夷志士)おい 聞いたか？
高杉のﾔﾂ 真選組と ﾄﾞﾝﾊﾟﾁやらかしたらしい｡
なんでも 真選組内部に ｽﾊﾟｲを送り込み➡
He apparently sent a spy into the Shinsengumi and tried to kill Chief Kondo.
局長 近藤の首を とろうとしたらしいぞ｡
まぁ 失敗に終わったようだがな｡
Well, he ended up failing, though.
ｽﾊﾟｲか… 我々も気をつけねば｡
A spy, huh? We should be careful. There may be a spy lurking about.
どこに ｽﾊﾟｲが 潜んでいるともしれぬ｡
≪(山崎)あの すみません！
Umm, excuse me.
(２人)だ… 誰だ!? (山崎)ちょっと待ってください！
Wh-Who are you?!
H-Hold on a second. I'm not suspicious.
怪しい者じゃないんです！
Who are you?! Give us your name!!
なんだ 貴様！ 名を名乗れ！ あの…➡
Umm... I see that you have a sword at your side when there's a ban on swords...
廃刀令のご時世に その腰の刀 攘夷志士様とお見受けいたします｡
I assume that you are Anti-Foreigner Faction members.
…何用だ？
What do you want?!
お願いします！ ｵﾚを…➡
Please...
Would you...
ｵﾚを 攘夷志士の皆さんの仲間に 入れてもらえないでしょうか？
Would you let me join the ranks of the Anti-Foreigner Faction?
["Life is a Test"]
《山崎:密偵の任務のうち 最も危険な仕事➡
This is the most dangerous part of my job as a spy.
それは 潜入捜査といわれる｡
It's called undercover investigations.
敵の内部に潜り込み その機密情報を味方に流す｡
I sneak into the ranks of the enemy and leak secret information to my allies.
釣れる魚も大きいが ﾘｽｸも大きい｡
The rewards are huge, but so is the risk.
よって この任務につく者は➡
Therefore, only the most skilled spies take on these missions.
密偵のなかでも 最も手練れとされている｡
敵の白刃の前に 己の命を晒しながら➡
You must be skilled enough to mask your true feelings while
顔色一つ変えない大胆さ｡
risking your life when faced with the danger of being discovered by the enemy.
敵陣のなか 一片のﾐｽも許されぬ➡
And you can't make a single mistake when in enemy territory.
極限のなかで 正確に 仕事をこなす繊細さ｡ そして…➡
You need finesse to perform your job with precision in extreme situations.
And...
すべてに溶け込む圧倒的な地味さ｡
You need to be extremely bland in order to blend in with everything.
これらを併せ持つのは➡
The person in the Shinsengumi
who has all of these traits is none other than I, Sagaru Yamazaki.
真選組において この山崎 退の他にはいない｡
まさか ｺｲﾂら攘夷志士が こんな街に潜伏していたとは…｡
I never expected Anti-Foreigner Faction members to be hiding in a town like this.
地下都市 ｱｷﾊﾞNEO｡
Akiba Neo, the underground city.
[Note: Parody of Akihabara.]
ｵﾀｸの聖地と呼ばれる 江戸随一のｶﾗｸﾘ街｡
Called a holy land by otaku, it's Edo's most famous mechanical district.
迷路のような この街は➡
The town is like a maze. It's indeed a perfect place for hiding out.
確かに 身を隠すには うってつけかもしれない…》
《山崎:狂乱の貴公子 桂 小太郎｡
The Unstoppable Kotaro Katsura.
なんとしても ﾔﾂに近づき 幹部どもの所在をつかみ➡
I have to get close to him. Find out where his officials are...
攘夷浪士を一網打尽にしてやる》
And round up all of the Anti-Foreigner Faction members.
(桂)なるほど あいわかった｡
I see. I understand.
はい じゃ これから 面接 始めます｡
All right. Let's begin the interview.
えっ…!? (桂)はい 履歴書 出して｡
Huh?
Give me your resume.
えっ… あの 攘夷志士って➡
Huh? Umm... I can't join the Anti-Foreigner Faction without passing an interview?
面接とおらないと なれないんですか？
密偵 ｽﾊﾟｲへの警戒だ｡
It's a precaution against spies.
素性も知れぬ輩に 背中を預けて 戦うことはできぬ｡
I can't fight and leave my back open to someone with a suspicious background.
What is this?
《なんだよ それ… なんで 攘夷活動に面接があるんだよ！》
Why do I need to take an interview to partake in Anti-Foreigner Faction activities?
す… すみません｡ 履歴書は忘れました｡
S-Sorry... I forgot my resume.
でも 国を憂う心は 誰にも負けないつもりです！
But I am more concerned about my country than anyone else.
I don't care about that. Just give me your resume.
いや そんなん いいから履歴書｡
あのさ はっきり 言わせてもらうけど➡
Let me give this to you straight.
ｷﾐ 常識あるのかな？ 普通さ 就活っていったら➡
Don't you have any common sense?
When you go job hunting, you usually bring a resume with you.
履歴書 持ってくるの 当たり前でしょう｡
《就活!? 就職活動なの これ!?》
Job hunting? I'm job hunting?!
ﾘｸﾙｰﾄｽｰﾂで来るのが 当たり前でしょう｡
You're supposed to come in a suit.
何しにきたの ｷﾐ？
What did you come here for?
別に こんなん言うの ｳﾁだけじゃないからね｡
I'm not the only one who will tell you this.
どこの会社でも 同じこと 言うからね 言っとくけど｡
Just to let you know, any company will say the same thing.
《会社じゃねえだろ！》
You're not a company!
それから ｷﾐ ｵﾚが座りなさいって 言う前に 勝手に席についたよね｡
Also, you sat down before I told you to.
普通は 面接官が座りなさいって 言ってから 席につくんだよ｡
Usually, you sit after your interviewer tells you to sit.
す… すみません｡
S-Sorry...
どこの企業も 欲しがる人材ってのは➡
All businesses want people who have common sense.
やっぱり常識を もってる人なんだよ｡
学歴社会なんていうけれどもね➡
We say that a person's education decides his worth...
仕事なんて やってれば そのうち 覚えていくからね 誰でも｡
But anyone can learn their job while they're doing it.
(ﾒｲﾄﾞ)ご主人様 お帰りなさいませ｡
Master, welcome back.
(桂)ご主人様じゃない 桂だ｡
I'm not "master." I'm Katsura.
特別料金をいただければ ﾒｲﾄﾞと遊べますよ！
If you pay a special fee, you can have fun with the maids.
《ｵﾒｴに言われたくねえよ！
I don't need you of all people to tell me that!!
なんで ﾒｲﾄﾞ喫茶で面接するﾔﾂに 説教されなきゃならないんだ！》
Why do I have to be lectured by someone who
holds an interview in a maid cafe?!
まぁ とにかくだ 攘夷志士といえど 常識は必要だ｡
Jankenpon.
[NOTE: Jankenpon is the Japanese name for Rock-Paper-Scissors. "Aikodesho" is said after tied rounds. In one game variation, the winner of a round points in a direction and the loser has to look in a different direction, or else he loses the game.]
Well, anyway, even though we're Anti-Foreigner Faction members,
we need common sense.
Aikodesho, sho, sho, sho.
既存の常識をぶち壊すのが革命家｡
Revolutionaries destroy the existing norms.
だからこそ 革命家は誰よりも 常識を知っていなければならない｡
And because of that, revolutionaries need to understand what's common and normal.
I win!!
Turn that way!
そのへんのこと ｷﾐも 攘夷志士になるなら➡
Keep that in mind if you want to become an Anti-Foreigner Faction member.
肝に銘じてほしい｡
Huh? I thought I was going to fail,
《あれ…？ もう ﾀﾞﾒかと思ったけど➡
なんか ｲｹるんじゃないか これ》
but this looks kind of good, doesn't it?
じゃあ 面接は これで終わりだから｡ おい 彼を｡
Jankenpon.
Well, the interview is over. Hey, take him.
Aikodesho.
《面接といっても ﾎﾝﾄ➡
Aikodesho, sho, sho, sho.
He said it was an interview, but did he really just want to meet me?
顔合わせくらいの 意味だったのかな？》
Let's go.
行くぞ｡ あ はい｡
Oh, yes.
《そうだよな｡ 攘夷志士に面接なんて➡
That's right.
Turn that way!
There's no way the Anti-Foreigner Faction
そんな おかしな話 あるわけないもんな｡
would ever do anything weird like have interviews.
よかったぁ… なんとか 潜入に成功したようだ》
I'm glad... I managed to infiltrate them.
[Anti-Foreigner Faction Employment Exam]
Why does the Anti-Foreigner Faction have an entrance test?!
《山崎:なんで 攘夷志士に試験!?
面接のうえ 今度は ﾃｽﾄ!?
First an interview, and now a test?!
This is no different from a regular business!
一般企業と 変わらんじゃないか!!
おかしいよ！ これ 絶対おかしい!!
This is weird! This is definitely weird!!
まずいぞ 攘夷志士になるのが こんな難関なんて➡
This is bad.
I never expected it to be so difficult to become an Anti-Foreigner Faction member.
まったく 予想だにしてなかった！
ﾃｽﾄって 問題どんなの出るんだ？ まったく勉強してないぞ!?
What kind of questions do they have on their test?!
I never studied for it!
みんな 何の勉強してるんだ？》
What is everyone studying?!
Hey, did you prepare?
(受験者)おい ｱﾝﾀ予習してきた？ ｵﾚ やべえよ｡
I'm in trouble. I didn't study at all. I'm going to fail. This is bad.
まったく勉強してこなかった 完全に落ちるわ～ やべえよ｡
《完全に 徹夜で勉強してきてるよ ｺｲﾂ｡
This guy's bloodshot eyes say otherwise.
ｸﾗｽに 一人はいるﾔﾂだよ》
There's always one faker in the class.
Oh...
はいはい 静かに～｡
All right, quiet down.
We're going to start the Anti-Foreigner Faction employment exam.
じゃあ これから攘夷志士 採用試験 始めるから｡
Put away your textbooks!
はい 教科書しまう！ 《山崎:教科書ってなんだよ!?》
What textbooks?!
(桂)今さらつめこんだところで もう遅い｡
It's too late to stuff anything else into your head now!
日頃から 予習復習してるﾔﾂには 敵わないの！
You're no match for those who have always been doing the review exercises!
《山崎:予習復習って 何を予習復習するんだよ!!》
Review exercises? What review exercises?!
はい これ見て｡
All right, take a look at this.
I'm going to put the questions up on the screen one by one.
今から このｽｸﾘｰﾝに 問題が１問ずつ出ます｡
皆さんは 手元のﾊﾟﾈﾙを使って その問題に答えていってください｡
Everyone, use the panel in front of you to answer each question.
問題が終わり次第 正解を発表していきます｡
Afterwards, I will announce the answer.
後ろで 試験官が 見張っているので➡
We have a proctor keeping watch in the back, so try not to cheat.
くれぐれも ｶﾝﾆﾝｸﾞはしないように｡
おのおの ﾍﾞｽﾄを尽くして がんばってください｡
Everyone, please try your best.
それじゃ 試験開始！
Let the test begin!
[Question 1 - Write down the correct reading of the following word: Shinsengumi]
Question one. Write down the correct reading of the following word.
What is this?! It's incredibly easy!! I see!
《なんだ これ!? 超簡単だよ そうか！》
((攘夷志士といえど 常識は必要だ))
Even though we're Anti-Foreigner Faction members, we need common sense.
Even if it's a test, it's a question to see how much common sense one has!
《ﾃｽﾄといっても ただの 一般常識をはかる問題なんだ｡
これなら 何の対策もしてない ｵﾚでも いけるぞ！
I haven't studied for this test, but it looks like I can pass this.
答えは ｢しんせんぐみ｣だ！》
[Shinsengumi]
The answer is "Shinsengumi"!
はい 時間切れ 解答は こちら｡
All right, time's up. This is the answer.
[Scum]
答えは ｢ｶｽ｣だ｡
The answer is "scum."
《どこの星の常識!?》
On what planet is that common sense?!
まぁ 我々 攘夷志士の間では 常識だな｡
Well, this is common sense amongst Anti-Foreigner Faction members.
Other answers like "idiots," "trash," and "lately intrusive" are also correct.
他にも ｢ﾊﾞｶ｣ ｢ｸｽﾞ｣ ｢最近出すぎ｣などの答えも➡
特別に正解とする｡ (受験者)よっしゃ～正解だ！
All right! I got it correct!
《山崎:こいつら 普段 ｵﾚたちのこと そんなふうに➡
Is that what these guys usually call us?!
呼んでんのか！》 ﾁｯ 引っかけかよ｡
Tsk! A trick question.
[Shin (crossed out)] Maeragumi]
You got the question wrong, too!
《山崎:ｵﾒｴは 普通に間違ってんだろうが！
何を 徹夜で勉強してきたんだ！
What did you study all night?!
ﾀﾞﾒだ 常識で答えても 正解できない！
This is bad. I can't even get the correct answer using common sense.
攘夷志士に なりきって答えないと…》
I need to answer the questions with the mindset of an Anti-Foreigner Faction member.
[Question 2 - Write down the correct reading for the following word: Shogun]
The second question. Write down the correct reading for the following word.
[Shogun Shogun Shogun Shogun Shogun Shogun]
《普通に考えれば ｢しょうぐん｣だ｡
The normal answer would be "shogun."
But to the Anti-Foreigner Faction, he is the boss of the enemy.
だが 攘夷志士にっとっては 敵のﾎﾞｽにあたる｡
…ということは！
Which means...
[Smegma]
けなしておけば 間違いない！》
I'll get it right if I insult him.
[Correct Answer: Ken Matsudaira]
正解は 松平 健だ｡
The correct answer is Ken Matsudaira.
Why is there a kanji reading for a kanji word?!
《山崎:なんで 漢字を 漢字で読んでんだ!?》
まぁ 志士の間では 常識だな｡ 他に ｢暴れん坊｣➡
Well, this is common sense amongst faction members.
"Roughneck," and "cooking lover" are also correct.
[Note: "Roughneck" is "Abarenbo" in Japanese. Ken Matsudaira is the star of the TV show Abarenbo Shogun.]
｢料理好き｣なども正解だ｡
All right! I did it!!
(２人)っしゃあ やったぁ！ 《山崎:なんで➡
Why are there people who got it correct?!
正解してるﾔﾂ いるんだよ～!? どんな脳みそしてんだ!?》
What kind of brains do they have?!
[Question 3 - Write down the following word in kanji: Jackie Chan]
The third question. Write down the following word in kanji.
This doesn't have anything to do with the Anti-Foreigner Faction anymore!
《山崎:もはや 攘夷と 何の関係もねえよ！
Jackie?! I don't know! This is just plain unreasonable!
ｼﾞｬｯｷｰ!? わかんねえ 普通に難しい！》
(桂)正解は ｢鼻｣だ｡
The answer is "nose."
[Nose]
You just hate Jackie's nose!!
《山崎:それ お前が ｼﾞｬｯｷｰの鼻 気になってるだけだろうが！》
まぁ 志士の間では 常識だな｡ 他には ｢椅子｣➡
Well, this is common sense amongst faction members.
"Chair" and "Ryo Saeba was pretty painful" are also correct.
[Note: Jackie Chan played Ryo Saeba in the Hong Kong version of City Hunter.]
｢冴羽 ﾘｮｳは さすがにきつかった｣ なども 正解｡
《最後のは お前の感想だろうが！
That last one was just your opinion! Don't mention City Hunter!
『CITY HUNTER』のことは 触れないでやれ!!》
ここまでが 国語だ｡ 次の問題から 数学にうつるぞ｡
We've been doing Japanese until now.
Starting with the next question, we'll be doing math.
This is bad... I still haven't got a single question right.
《山崎:まずいぞ… まだ一問も正解してない》
(桂)問四 真選組が10人 攘夷志士が６人➡
Question number four.
There are ten Shinsengumi members.
Six Anti-Foreigner Faction members run into them on the side of the road.
道端で 鉢合わせしました｡
切りかかってくる真選組に 攘夷志士は ３人斬られました｡
The Shinsengumi attack, and three of the Anti-Foreigner Faction members are killed.
負けじと 攘夷志士は 真選組を２人斬りました｡
Unyielding, the Anti-Foreigner Faction members kill two Shinsengumi members.
混戦の中 真選組は さらに２人負傷しましたが➡
Amidst the confusion of the battle,
two more Shinsengumi members are injured,
加勢に ６人が入り 攘夷志士は ２人斬られました｡
but six more join them and two Anti-Foreigner Faction members are killed.
ｼﾞｬｯｷｰの鼻は 何個ですか？
How many noses does Jackie have?
《山崎: ｢１個｣に決まってんだろうが！
One, of course!!
ｼﾞｬｯｷｰ どんだけ引っ張ってんだよ！
How long are you going to keep talking about Jackie?!
斬りあいのくだり 丸々いらないだろ！》
This has absolutely nothing to do with the battle!!
Umm... This question is incredibly difficult, so I'll give you extra time.
え～ この問題は相当難しいので 時間を多めにとります➡
Think about it for an hour.
１時間 よく考えてください｡
I don't need an hour!
《１時間も いらねえよ！
あ… いや 待てよ？
No...wait! He's been giving us deceptive answers until now.
今まで 散々ひねくれた問題が 出てきたんだ｡
あっ… もしｼﾞｬｯｷｰがこの 斬り合いのなかにいたとしたら…｡
What if Jackie was in this battle?!
What if Jackie's nose...
もし斬り合いの最中 ｼﾞｬｯｷｰの鼻が 切り落とされていたら…》
Was cut off in the battle?!
(桂)正解は １個です｡
The correct answer is "one."
そこ 静かにしなさい！
You there, be quiet.
あっ すみません｡
Oh, sorry...
《完全にひっかかった｡
I was completely tricked!
深読みしすぎて 解ける問題も逃してしまった！》
I read into it too much and let a question I could answer slip by!
ﾁｯ ひっかけかよ 惜しかったぜ｡
Tsk! A trick question, huh?
That was close.
《お前はいったい 何にひっかかったんだ！》
What exactly were you tricked by?!
(桂)え～ 数学はこれで終わりだ｡
Umm... That's it for math.
《数学じゃねえよ こんなの！》
This isn't math!
[Question 5 - Translate the following passage.]
(桂)次は 外来語問題｡ 問五 次の長文を訳しなさい｡
The next section is foreign language.
Question five. Translate the following passage.
《何語だこれ！ 全然読めない！
What language is this?! I can't read it at all!!
どこかの星の言語か？
Is this an alien language from another planet?!
挿絵？ そうだ 挿絵だ！
An illustration?! That's it! That illustration!
That picture has got to represent the contents of the passage!
あの絵は必ず この長文の 内容を表した絵のはず…｡
この絵を頼りに 勘で訳すしかない！
I've got to rely on intuition and this picture to translate it!
この絵はどう見ても 戦場の絵だ｡
No matter how I look at this, it's a picture of a battlefield.
片方が死ぬ間際で もう１人は➡
One guy is about to die and the other is listening to his last words.
その言葉に 耳を傾けていると見て間違いない｡
There's no mistake...
手に何か持っている！
He has something in his hand!
A letter? No, a photograph!
紙？ いや 写真だ！》
((軍曹:ｵﾚのことはいい… 早く逃げろ ｸｿ虫が！
Never mind me... Hurry up and run away, you maggot!
＜二等兵: ﾎﾞｸの腕の中で 軍曹の体は➡
The Sergeant quickly grew cold in my arms...
みるみる冷たくなっていく…｡
あれほど恐ろしく 憎らしかった鬼教官の顔が➡
He was a drill sergeant who was so terrifying and hateful.
今は 優しく見えた＞
But right now his face looked so kind.
上官の命令が聞けんのか ｸｿ虫！
Can't you follow your superior's orders, you maggot?!
ｸｿ虫 私はｸｿ虫だと言え ｸｿ虫が！
Maggot! Tell me you're a maggot, you maggot!
Sergeant! I am a maggot!
教官！ 自分はｸｿ虫であります｡
ｸｿ虫のごとく 親に捨てられ 生きてきました｡
I was abandoned by my parents like a maggot!
No one will be sad if a maggot like me dies!
自分のようなｸｿ虫が 死のうと悲しむ者はいません！
どうか 好きにさせてください！
Please let me do whatever I want!
奇遇だなぁ ｸｿ虫｡
What a coincidence, maggot!
私も武器を 取るとき家族を捨ててきた｡
When I took up arms, I also discarded my family.
悲しむものなど どこにもいない｡
No one will grieve for me anymore. But you're different...
だが お前は違う｡
＜二等兵: そういうと軍曹は おもむろに 内ﾎﾟｹｯﾄから➡
After the Sergeant said this he slowly took a blood-splattered photograph
血のついた写真を取り出した＞
out of his inner breast pocket.
悲しむものが ここにいる…｡
You have someone who will grieve for you.
＜二等兵:そこには 若かりし頃 まだ元気だった頃のﾎﾞｸの母｡
It was a picture of when my mother was still young and healthy.
その隣りには赤ん坊を抱えた 軍曹の姿があった＞
By her side was the Sergeant. He was holding a baby.
ｵﾚをｸｿ虫と言え 息子よ…｡
Tell me I'm a maggot...my son.
教官は ｸｿ虫であります｡
Instructor...
You're a maggot.
ｸｿ虫の大事な ｸｿ親父であります！))
You're a maggot's precious...good-for-nothing father!
＜二等兵: 教官は 一度ﾌｯと笑うと➡
The instructor smiled and ceased moving.
そのまま動かなくなった…＞
《よし これならいけるはずだ！》
All right. This should be good!
では 正解｡
Now, the correct answer...
((ｼﾞｬｯｷｰやっぱ鼻でかくねえ？))
Jackie's nose is big, isn't it?
(桂)です｡
That's it.
《ｼﾞｬｯｷｰの写真だったのかよ！
It was a picture of Jackie?!
つうか ｼﾞｬｯｷｰの 鼻のでかさ表現すんのに➡
How long a passage do you need to express how big Jackie's nose is?!
どんだけ長い文章 使わなきゃいけないんだよ！》
間違ってたけど 感動したよ｡
It was wrong but I was touched.
《人の答案見てんじゃねえ！
Don't look at my answer! It's too embarrassing!
何かすげえ 恥ずかしいだろうが！》
それでは 次が筆記試験 最終問題｡
The next question is the final question in the written exam.
《もう最後？ ほとんど ｼﾞｬｯｷｰの問題しか出てないよ！》
The last one already?! Most of the questions were only about Jackie!
[Question 6 - Write down the reason why you want to join the Anti-Foreigner faction in Kamchatkan.] [Note: Kamchatkan is a language spoken in northeast Russia.]
Write down the reason why you want to join the Anti-Foreigner faction in Kamchatkan.
What?! Kamchatkan?!
(受験生たち)えぇ～！ ｶﾑﾁｬｯｶ語？
無理だよこんなの！ あんな 難解な言語 書けるわけねえよ！
This is impossible!! I can't write in such a difficult language!
難しい問題なので 正解できれば これ１問で合格だ｡
This is a difficult question so if you get this right, you pass.
《はぁ～ 終わったな｡
It's over. I failed my mission.
任務失敗… 副長にどやされる…｡
The Vice-Chief is going to be angry with me.
I'll just write anything...
もう適当でいいや…》
え～ １人正解者が出た｡
Umm... One person got it correct. Examinee number 11!
受験番号 11番｡
Wow!
Huh?
えっ？ (受験生たち)おぉ～っ！
I just wrote anything. Is this for real?!
《適当に書いたのに ﾏｼﾞでか？
Whatever the case, I can carry out my mission! All right!
ともあれこれで 任務をまっとうできる｡
やったぁ！》
ｵﾚやったぞ！
I did it!
え～ 正解例として 彼の答案を見てみよう｡
Umm... Since he got it correct, let's take a look at his answer.
ま 訳すとだな ｢私は 潜入捜査でここへやって来ました｡
When translated, it says, "I came here to carry out an undercover investigation.
攘夷志士どもを １人残らず 地獄に叩き落してやる｣｡
I will send all you Anti-Foreigner Faction members to hell."
《えっ… えっ？》
Huh?
What?!
《えぇ～!? や… やばい…｡
Th-This is bad...
潜入捜査で来ていることが ﾊﾞﾚた！ どういうことだ!?
They discovered that I've come to do an undercover investigation!
What's the meaning of this?!
Did they know who I was from the beginning?!
最初から 正体を知られていたのか!?》
あ… あの…｡
U-Umm...
ふむ… 潜入捜査隊 希望か｡ よくできたな｡ 皆 拍手だ｡
Hmm... You wish to become a part of our undercover investigation squad.
Good job. Everyone, give him a round of applause.
(拍手)
Huh?
《へっ？ ﾊﾞﾚたんじゃないんだ…｡ よかった｡ これで…》
They didn't find out who I was...
Thank goodness... Now I can...
(桂)では 筆記試験合格者は 引き続き➡
Those who have passed the written exam will now take the final test.
最終試験科目 実技の試験を行う｡
We will have a skills test.
《えっ？ えっ？》
Huh? Huh?
You will take a skills test for undercover investigation.
ｷﾐの希望ｺｰｽである 潜入捜査の 実技ﾃｽﾄをやってもらおう｡
Undercover investigation is one of the most difficult
潜入捜査は もっとも難しい 攘夷活動のひとつといえよう｡
of Anti-Foreigner Faction activities.
The enemy isn't stupid enough to overlook spies.
敵も そう やすやす ｽﾊﾟｲを 見逃すほど ﾊﾞｶではないからな｡
There is an idiot right in front of me!!
《ﾊﾞｶ いるんですけど｡ 目の前に》
ﾃｽﾄといえど 何が起こるか わからん｡
Even though it's a test, you don't know what'll happen.
そこで 指導教官のもとで 試験を実施する｡ ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ隊長！
So you will take the test under supervison.
Captain Dragon!
ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ隊長…？
Captain...Dragon?
(ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ)は～い！ あ～らよっと!!
ほ～らよっと！
あ そ～らよっとっとっと！
あ… あの！
U-Umm...
(ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ)どうも！ 隊長のﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝです｡ えっ？
Hello, I'm Captain Dragon.
Huh?
これから 私とある組織の本部へと 潜入してもらう｡
You're going to be sneaking into the headquarters of a certain organization with me.
そこにある 密書を 手に入れられれば 合格｡
You'll pass if you can steal a secret document.
Then you'll be a formal Anti-Foreigner Faction member. Got that?
晴れて 攘夷志士の仲間入りだ｡ わかったか？
いや… っていうか あれですよね？
Well, anyway... You're one of those, aren't you?
You're supposed to be him, aren't you? You're a Jackie look-alike...
あの人ですよね？ もろ ｼﾞｬｯｷｰ的な…｡
I'm not Jackie. I'm Captain Dragon!
ｼﾞｬｯｷｰじゃない！ ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ隊長だ!! (山崎)あ 顔 近いです…｡
Your face is really close to mine.
Let me ask you one thing.
(ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ)ひとつ 問おう！ 潜入捜査で なによりも➡
What is the one thing you must protect
守らなければならないものは なんだと思う？
more than anything during an undercover investigation?
《えっ!? これも試験の問題か？》
Huh? Is this a test question?
答えは ｢鼻｣だ｡ 鼻？
The answer is "your nose."
Your nose?
That's right. Your nose!
そう 鼻だ！ 人間の体の中には あらゆるところに急所がある｡
There are many vital spots on the human body.
(ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ)いちばんの急所というと 素人は➡
Amateurs often guess that the testicles are the most vulnerable spot,
金的を想像するが それは間違いだ｡
but this is wrong!
いちばんの急所は 鼻だ！ わかったか!?
The most vulnerable spot is the nose!!
Got that?!
それでは 最終試験｡
The final test...
Project Z will now begin!!
PROJECT Ｚ 開始！
ささっ…｡ ささっ…｡
《山崎:これか！ 意外と 簡単だったな》
There it is. This was unexpectedly easy.
I did it! I've passed the skills test!
やった！ これで実技試験もｸﾘｱだ｡
(桂)ﾊｰｯﾊｯﾊｯﾊｯﾊ!!
What wonderful skills! You've passed so far!
みごとな手際だ｡ ここまでは 合格といえよう｡
But you're being tested until you get that secret document safely to our headquarters!
しかし その密書を持って➡
無事 我々の本部に たどり着くまでが 試験！
Your excursion continues until you greet the people back home!
ただいま と 家の人に言うまでが遠足だ！
Shh... Katsura-san, the enemy's going to find us!
ｼｰｯ！ 桂さん 敵に見つかってしまいます｡
Hey, who was talking just now?!
(敵)おい！ なんだ!? 今の声は!! (敵)侵入者がいるぞ！
We've got intruders!
They're in the secret documents room!
(敵)密書のある部屋だ！ (山崎)だぁ～！ ﾊﾞﾚた!!
They discovered us!
ﾌﾝ！ かんじんなところで 敵に 見つかってしまうとはまだ甘いな｡
The enemy found you during a crucial time. You're still too naïve.
They discovered us because of you!
ｱﾝﾀのせいで ﾊﾞﾚたんだろうが！
Let's run away! Follow me, exam student!
逃げるぞ！ ｵﾚについてこい 受験生｡ あ～っ！
(敵)待て！ あそこだ!!
Wait! They're over there!
お… 追ってきましたよ！
Th-They followed us!
[Question: Choose the correct action to take in this situation.]
Here's a question. Choose the correct action to take in this situation.
ここで問題です｡ この状況で 正しい行動を取りなさい｡
《山崎:えっ!? これも試験なの？
Huh?! This is part of the test?!
The correct action? Our only choice is to run away...
つうか 正しい行動ったって 逃げるしか… ん!?
自転車… ﾇﾝﾁｬｸ… ﾊﾝｶﾞｰ… こげたｻｯｶｰﾎﾞｰﾙ… 時計塔？
[Clock Tower]
A bicycle?
Nunchucks? A hanger? A dirty soccer ball?
A clock tower?
そうか！ あの中のものを使えばいいのか｡
I see! I have to use one of these objects!
ここは なにより先に 逃げるべきだ｡ それは…》
More than anything, I should choose to escape. In that case...
これだ！
This is it!!
正解は こっちだ！ (２人)とぅっ！
This is the correct answer!!
《しまった！ あれが模範解答か…》
Oh no! So that was the correct answer!
って… 落ちるんかい!!
You fell?!
The answer is, "We'll use that cut for the outtakes during the ending credits."
[Note: Parody of a Hong Kong Kung-fu action movie.]
正解は今のｶｯﾄをｴﾝﾃﾞｨﾝｸﾞのＮＧ集に 使う です｡ (山崎)使うか!!
I can't use that!
いくぞ！ ここは 得意のｶｰﾁｪｲｽで乗り切るぞ｡
Let's go! We're going to shake them off with a car chase. I'm good at that.
(敵)いたぞ！ 止まりやがれ!!
There they are. Stop!
(ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ)まずい!!
This is bad.
(２人)うわ～っ！
(山崎)なんで 鼻？ 鼻 守るんなら 尻も守れよ！
Why your nose?!
If you can protect your nose, you should've protect your butt!
心配は無用だ… 我々は このような危機を➡
Don't worry about us! We've overcome danger like this many times.
何度となく切り抜けて…｡ (山崎)ただﾏﾇｹなだけだろうが！
You're just fools!
(３人)ﾊｯ ﾊｯ ﾊｯ…｡
(山崎)くっ… 行き止まりだ｡ ｸｿｯ…｡
It's a dead end.
Crap!
(敵)いたぞ！ あっちだ！
There they are! They're over there!
(山崎)しまった！ 追っ手が…｡
Oh no! They're after us!
[Question: Choose the correct action to take in this situation.]
Here's a question. Choose the correct action to take in this situation.
ここで問題です｡ この状況で 正しい行動を取りなさい｡
まず お前が正しい行動を取れ！ まったく… ここは戦うしかない｡
You should take the correct course of action!
Honestly...
We've got to fight!
ﾌﾞｯﾌﾞ～！ 正解は ｢ﾃﾞﾌﾞｺﾞﾝを呼ぶ｣です｡ ﾃﾞﾌﾞｺﾞ～ﾝ！
Wrong. The correct answer is to call Fatgon.
[Note: Parody of "Enter The Fat Dragon" by Sammo Hung]
Fatgon!
(ﾃﾞﾌﾞｺﾞﾝ)なんだよ？ ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ｡
What is it, Dragon?
なんで ﾃﾞﾌﾞｺﾞﾝ？ なんで ここにいんの!?
Why Fatgon?! Why is he here?!
ちなみに ｳﾝﾋﾟｮｳを呼んだ場合 半分 点をあげます｡
If you called Un Pyao, you would have gotten half a point.
[Note: Parody of Yuan Biao. Also a Hong Kong action star.]
呼ぶか！ そんなことより こっから逃げんだろうがよ!!
Why would I do that?!
Anyway, we've got to get away from here!
なるほど！ だが それぐらいの答えでは➡
I see! But I won't give you a point for that!
点は やれんな｡ (山崎)いるか！
I don't need any!
(山崎)またかよ… なんで 江戸の街は➡
Again?! Why is Edo filled with dead ends?
行き止まりばっかなんだよ！ 幕府は何やってんだよ!!
What is the Shogunate doing?!
んっ？ 攘夷志士的 鋭い意見だ｡ ３点あげよう｡
That's a poignant Anti-Foreigner Faction-like comment.
I'll give you three points.
しつけーんだよ！
You're annoying!
(山崎)くっ… ここまでか…｡
This is the end of the line...
ここで問題です｡ この状況 ﾃﾞﾌﾞｺﾞﾝなら どうすると思いますか？
Here's a question. What do you think Fatgon should do in this situation?
[Question: What should Fatgon do in this situation?]
…って もう それ ｼﾞｬｯｷｰから離れてるから！
That has nothing to do with Jackie anymore! He's Fatgon!
ﾃﾞﾌﾞｺﾞﾝだから！ もう！ あっ…｡
わりぃな ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ｡ ｵﾚ まだ 死にたくないんでね｡
Sorry, Dragon, I don't want to die.
(ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ)見損なったぞ！
I'm disappointed in you!
ｺｿ泥だったときと 何も変わらないじゃないか！
You're no different from when you were a thief!
(山崎)ｺｿ泥に助けを求めた ｱﾝﾀを見損なったわ！
I'm disappointed in you for trying to get help from a thief!
話は あとだ｡ やっちまえ!!
We'll talk afterwards. Get them!
(みんな)ﾄﾘｬ～!!
受験生！ 体を張って密書は守れ！
Exam student, use your body to protect the secret document!
た～っ！
おっと…｡
(ﾃﾞﾌﾞｺﾞﾝ)とうっ！ (ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ)あ～っ！
You should protect more than just your nose!
お前は 鼻以外も守れ！ よし 今だ…｡
All right, now!
(桂)ここ問題です！
Here's a question!
(ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ)仲間が襲われています｡ (桂)いったい どうしますか！
Your comrade is being attacked!
What should you do?!
(山崎)素直に 助けてって 言えばいいんじゃないですか!?
Why don't you just ask me for help?!
《桂は もともと 敵… ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ隊長だって攘夷志士の仲間だ｡
Katsura is my enemy.
Captain Dragon is allied with the Anti-Foreigner Faction.
ならば ｱｲﾂらを見捨てていっても 構わないはずだ｡
In that case, there should be no problem if I abandon them.
しかし これは潜入捜査｡ ｽﾊﾟｲたるもの 身も心も➡
But this is an undercover mission.
A spy must become an Anti-Foreigner Faction member in mind and body.
攘夷志士にならなければ ならない… なら…！》
In that case...
うあ～っ!!
逃げましょう！ 桂さん！ ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ隊長！
Let's run away, Katsura-san, Captain Dragon!
攘夷志士たるもの 志を 完遂させるためならば➡
An Anti-Foreigner Faction member must sometimes
ときに 非情に徹するべし｡ お前は あそこで逃げても構わなかった｡
be cold-hearted in order to accomplish his goals.
You should have run away.
試験では 点数は やれんな…｡
I can't give you any points for the test.
しかし 人としては合格だ！
But you pass as a human being.
(山崎)ｸｿｯ もう少しだったのに…｡
Crap... We were almost there.
まだ終わりじゃない｡ ｵﾚたちには まだ知恵も力も残っている｡
It's still not over, yet. We've still got more tricks!
ﾑﾀﾞに かっこいいこと言って ますけど さすがに これは…｡
That's a really cool thing to say, but this is all to much...
ここで問題です｡
Here's a question.
仲間の助けもない｡ 目の前には悪党ども｡
Your comrades can't help you and you're surrounded by bad guys.
この絶望的な状況で 正しい行動を取りなさい｡
Choose the correct course of action in this hopeless situation.
《わかりっこない こんな状況…｡
I don't know... What should I do in this situation?
いったい どうすればいいってんだ…》
正解は…｡
The correct answer is...
｢諦めないこと｣だ｡ でも…！
To not give up!
But...
(ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ)お前は その密書を 持って逃げろ！
Take the secret document and run away.
Huh? But what about you two?
ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ隊長たちは…｡
ｵﾚたちは…｡ (ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ)新しい仲間を…｡
We'll...
Protect...
(ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ/桂)守る!!
Our new comrade!!
桂さん… ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ隊長！
Katsura-san!
Captain Dragon!
行け！ 早く行くんだ！
Go! Get outta here!!
ｵﾚたちの行為を ﾑﾀﾞにするな!!
Don't let our efforts go to waste!
行け!!
Go!
(敵)させるか！
I won't let you!
Katsura-san, Captain Dragon, I'll come back with reinforcements!
桂さん！ ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ隊長！
仲間を… 仲間を連れて 絶対 戻ってきますから!!
(敵)ﾔﾂを逃がすな!! (ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ)させるか！
Don't let him get away!
I won't let you!
助けを… 早く 助けを…！
I need to get help! I need to find help right away!
桂さんと ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ隊長が…！
Katsura-san and Captain Dragon are...
(拍手)
えっ？ えぇっ？
Huh? Huh?
よく がんばったな｡ 見事 合格だ｡
You did well. You passed magnificently.
ｷﾐも 今日から 立派な攘夷志士だぞ｡
From today on, you're an Anti-Foreigner Faction member!
桂さん… ﾄﾞﾗｺﾞﾝ隊長…｡
Katsura-san, Captain Dragon...
(桂)ん？ 何か落としたぞ｡
You dropped something...
[Shogunate Special Armed Police Shinsengumi Investigator Sagaru Yamazaki]
(みんな)あっ…｡
Huh?
(山崎)えっ… え～っ!!
What?!
[Preview]
The next episode... "People Are All Escapees of Their Own Inner Prisons."
[Were Yamazaki's actions worthwhile? Katsura is thrown in jail.]
[The steel fortress, Prison Island. Can Katsura safely escape?!]