[We were scolded last week. So this week, we're cleaning toilets as an apology.]
[Also, there's a new ending today. Please watch the show to the very end, okay?]
[Shinsengumi Headquarters]
(土方)え～ それでは 今週の掃除当番を決める｡
Here is this week's cleanup duty roster.
(土方) 三番隊は道場｡ 二番隊は台所｡
Squad 3: dojo. Squad 2: kitchen. Squad 5: patrol cars. Squad 1...
五番隊 ﾊﾟﾄｶｰ｡ 一番隊…➡
厠｡
toilets...
(隊士たち)いぃ!?
(隊士)うぇ～っ！
[Toilets]
(隊士)汚ねえな！ 気分悪くなってきた!!
Gross...I feel sick.
(隊士)はぁ… 今週１週間➡
We're going to spend the next week with these filthy toilets.
この汚い便器と 顔を合わせなきゃならねえのか！
(隊士)気が重いぜ！ (隊士)あぁ 顔はねた!! ｵｴｯ!!
I feel depressed.
It splashed on my face!
(隊士)適当なところで切り上げて さっさと仕事 戻ろうぜ！
Let's call it a day and get back to our jobs.
(清蔵)いけませんぞ！ (隊士たち)えっ!?
That wouldn't be right.
(清蔵)清掃を いかに心得ておいでか｡
What do you people think cleaning is?
(清蔵)こんな話を 聞いたことが おありか？
Have you heard this story?
(清蔵)治安の悪い犯罪都市で➡
When the graffiti-covered subways in a crime-filled city were cleaned up,
落書きで汚れた地下鉄を きれいに掃除したところ➡
以降 落書きをする者は いなくなり➡
the vandals who did the graffiti disappeared and crime decreased.
犯罪も減少したのです｡
(清蔵)わかりますか？
Don't you see?
Filthy surroundings soil the soul.
不浄な空間は 人の 魂までも汚すのです｡
健全な魂は 健全な空間において 培われるのです｡
A healthy soul is nurtured by healthy surroundings.
(清蔵)身の回りを 清浄に保つ｡
Keeping our surroundings clean...
これも立派な真選組の仕事ですぞ｡
This is also a part of the Shinsengumi's job.
(隊士)清蔵さん！ (隊士)清蔵？
Seizo-san...
Seizo?
(隊士)この間の隊の再編成で 一番隊に入った 隈無 清蔵だよ｡
Seizo Kumanaku. He joined Squad 1 during the recent reorganization of squads.
[Note: Seizo Kumanaku is a play on "kumanaku seiso" which means to completely clean something.]
(隊士)えらく きれい好きで 有名らしいぜ！
He's well known for his extreme fastidiousness.
いいですか？ 皆さん｡
Listen, everyone.
(清蔵)自分で便器を舐めてもいい と思えるほどに磨くのです｡
Clean until you'd be willing to lick the urinal.
(清蔵)おのおの 自分の便器を 責任をもって磨きなさい!!
Make it your responsibility to clean your urinal.
はい １ ２！ １ ２!!
Okay. One, two.
One, two.
How does it feel?
どうですか？ 便器の汚れとともに➡
Don't you feel your soul becoming cleaner as the filth washes away from the urinal?
己の心も清くなっていくのを 感じませんか？
そうです 清掃は 己の心を磨く行為なのです｡
That's right. Cleaning is an act that polishes your soul.
(沖田)ほんとだ… 心が洗われるようだ｡
You're right. It's as though my soul is being cleansed.
One, two. One, two. Cleaning is a lot of fun, Seizo-san.
１ ２！ １ ２!!
うん 掃除っていうのも なかなか おもしれえなぁ 清蔵さん｡
隊長 どこを掃除してるんですか！
Captain, what are you doing?
いやぁ おでこに 鼻くそ ついてたからよ！
Well, there was a booger on your forehead.
それ ﾎｸﾛです｡
That's a mole.
But I got if off.
いやぁ でも とれたぜ！ (清蔵)何してくれてんですか!!
What have you done?!
(沖田)ﾎｸﾛだったのか… そいつぁ 悪いことしたな｡
That was a mole? Sorry about that.
(清蔵)なんで (流水音) 流してんですか！
Why'd you flush it down?!
あぁ 私のﾎｸﾛ！ あぁ～!!
My mole...
(隊士)よっしゃ 今のうちだ～！
Hey, now's our chance...
あっ ちょっと待ってください！ 掃除は まだ終わっていませんよ!!
Just a minute! You haven't finished cleaning!
ちょっと～！
Wait...
(沖田)あ～あ 行っちまった｡
Oh, they're gone.
ったく ろくでもねえ連中だな｡
They're hopeless.
どうする？ ｵﾚたちも行くか？
What're you going to do? Shall we leave, too?
隊長 男所帯ということを 踏まえても➡
Captain, even though only men live here, these conditions are abhorrent.
この状況は ひどすぎます｡
誰も厠を きれいに使おうとしない｡
No one tries to keep the urinals clean when they use them.
誰も厠を きれいにしようとしない｡
No one tries to clean the toilets.
(清蔵)小便を便器から こぼすことは当たり前｡
They dribble urine outside the urinals as though that's how it's supposed to be.
まず 手も洗うことはない｡
They don't wash their hands.
(清蔵)その菌にまみれた足で 屯所内を歩き回り➡
They walk about headquarters covered with germs and
touch everything with their germ-covered hands.
その菌にまみれた手で あちこちに触る｡
(清蔵)菌は 人から人 物から人へと伝染し増殖していく｡
The germs are transmitted from person to person
and from objects to people, and multiply...
(清蔵)もう この屯所は 菌にまみれた魔窟です｡
This headquarters is a germ-infested den.
(清蔵) この厠から生まれた よどみは➡
The stagnation caused by the germs
やがて真選組の 魂さえも 濁らせていきますぞ｡
will eventually cloud the soul of the Shinsengumi.
(清蔵)改革が必要なんです｡
A revolution is needed.
The Shinsengumi must change, starting here at its source: the toilets.
この厠から この厠という底辺から 今➡
真選組は 変わっていかなければならない｡
そう 厠革命です！
That's right...
A toilet revolution!
["Cleaning the Toilet Cleanses the Soul"]
(土方)あぁ!? 厠の設備を 一新してほしいだ？
Huh?
You want new toilets?
えぇ ｳﾁの隊員の 隈無 清蔵からの提言でして…｡
Yes. It's a suggestion by my squad member, Seizo Kumanaku.
せめて 厠の手洗いを蛇口式から➡
He requests that we at least change the faucets
from handle-type to sensor-type.
ｾﾝｻｰ式に 替えてくれとのことでさあ｡
そんなﾑﾀﾞなことに使う 金も時間もねえんだよ｡
We don't have the funds or the time to spend on such useless projects.
厠 掃除してる暇があるなら➡
If you have free time to spend cleaning toilets,
市中で攘夷浪士でも掃除してきな｡
spend it cleaning the Anti-Foreigner Faction in the city.
失礼ですが副長…｡
Begging the Vice-Chief's pardon,
副長は 用を足したあと お手を洗われになりますか？
but do you wash your hands after doing your business?
あん？ 洗うけど…｡
Huh? Yeah, I wash them.
では なぜ 手を お洗いになるのですか？
Then let me ask you: why do you wash your hands?
いったい 用を足す際 なんで手が汚れるのですか？
Why do your hands become dirty when you do your business?
なんでもくそも気分悪いだろう 手 洗わねえと｡
You know damn well-I don't feel right unless I wash them.
ごまかさないでいただきたい｡
Don't try to hide it.
もっと明確に確実に 汚い何かに触れているでしょう！
To be more precise,
it's because you touched something that is certainly filthy, isn't that right?
それは 何ですか？ 何に触ったんですか!?
What is it? What did you touch? What is it that's filthy?
何が汚いんですか！
Well it's...
何って… ﾅﾆだろう｡
you know...that.
そうです！ 男は どうしたって用を足す際➡
That's right
No matter how a man does it,
股に ぶら下がる汚いﾅﾆに➡
he has to touch that filthy something that
hangs between his legs when he does his business!
触れなければ いけないわけでしょう！
つまり 用を足したあと 手を洗うという行為は➡
In other words,
the act of washing one's hands after doing one's business
ﾅﾆに触ったことをﾘｾｯﾄし➡
is a way of resetting oneself after touching that thing.
It is an important rite of purification for going on with one's life!
明日を生きていくための 重要な禊の儀式なわけでしょう！
しかし この真選組屯所においては➡
However!
Are you aware that here at the Shinsengumi Headquarters,
この禊の儀式を 行ったつもりでも➡
people think they're performing this rite when in fact, they are not?!
その実 行えてないことに あなたは気づいていない！
いいですか！ ﾅﾆに触れたときに 手につく菌…｡
All right.
Let's call the germs that get on your hands
when you touch your thing, tamakin!
[Note: Tama (balls) + kin (germ).]
これを仮に ﾀﾏ菌と名付けましょう！
用を足す… このとき副長の手は ﾀﾏ菌だらけになっています｡
You do your business. And your hands are covered with tamakin.
(土方)お～い やめてくんない！ ｵﾚ ﾓﾃﾞﾙにするの｡
Hey, cut it out. Don't use me as an example.
(清蔵)ﾀﾏ菌だらけになった 手を洗うべく➡
You're going to wash your tamakin-covered hands,
副長は 蛇口をひねる｡
so you turn the handle on the faucet. You wash off the tamakin.
(清蔵)ﾀﾏ菌を 水で洗い流す｡
確かに この時点では 手は きれいになりました｡
Indeed, your hands are clean at this point.
(清蔵)しかし！ しかし…｡
However! However! Take a step back and think about it.
振り返って よく考えてください｡
Okay? What did you do just now to wash off the tamakin, Vice-Chief?
いいですか！ ﾀﾏ菌を洗い落とすため➡
さっき 副長は何をしたかな？ (土方)おい なんで ﾀﾒｸﾞﾁなんだよ｡
Hey, you're getting a little too friendly.
(清蔵)そう～！ 副長は 水を流すため➡
That's right!
To turn on the water,
you turned the handle of the faucet with your tamakin-covered hand!
ﾀﾏ菌だらけの手で 蛇口をひねった｡
Of course, a large number of tamakin are now on the faucet!
当然 蛇口には 大量のﾀﾏ菌がついています｡
そして ﾀﾏ菌を洗い流した 副長は 今➡
Then, after washing off the tamakin, Vice-Chief, what did you do?!
What did you do with those clean hands?
その きれいになった手で 何をするか？
水を止めるために もう一度 ﾀﾏ菌だらけの蛇口を➡
You turned the tamakin-covered handle once more to turn off the water!
ひねらなければならない！
副長～！ ｱﾝﾀは 結局 最終的に ﾀﾏ菌をﾃｲｸｱｳﾄしてるんですよ～!!
Vice-Chief, ultimately, you've helped spread the tamakin!
やな言い方すんじゃねえよ！
Don't make it sound so bad!
なんで ｵﾚだけ みたいになってんだよ？
Why're you making it sound as though I'm the only one who does it?!
If that's the case,
それを言うなら あの蛇口を使ってる ﾃﾒｴら全員➡
then all of you who use that faucet are covered with tamakin, as well!
ﾀﾏ菌まみれだろうが！ (沖田)残念でしたね 土方さん｡
Too bad, Hijikata-san.
ｵﾗｧ 用をたしても あそこで手を洗いやせん｡
I don't wash my hands after doing my business.
I just leave the toilet.
そのまま 厠を出ます｡ (土方)それ 直接➡
You're directly spreading the tamakin!
ﾀﾏ菌 ﾃｲｸｱｳﾄしてるだけだろうが!!
副長 わかってくれましたか？
Vice-Chief, do you understand now?
今のままでは 真選組は ﾀﾏ菌まみれなのです｡
The way things are, the Shinsengumi is covered with tamakin.
それを打開するためには 蛇口式をやめ➡
The only way to break through this situation is to change
the faucets from handle-type to sensor-type.
ｾﾝｻｰ式の手洗いを 導入するしかない｡
ﾌﾝ！ ﾃﾒｴは 考えすぎなんだよ｡
You think too much. You can't go about your life if you worry about germs.
菌なんか気にしてたら 生活なんてできねえよ｡
は～ ったく くだらねえ｡
Utterly ridiculous!
(山崎)副長～！
Vice-Chief.
(山崎)向こうで ﾄｳﾓﾛｺｼ焼いてんですが➡
We're grilling corn on the cob. Would you like to join us?
副長も 一緒に食べませんか？
うわぁぁぁ～!!
What the-!!
おぼし～っ!! うがっ!!
…何だ ありゃ？
What is that?!
Did you see it, Vice-Chief?
副長にも見えましたか？
ﾀﾏ菌が…｡
Tamakin...
ﾀﾏ菌!? まさか あれが！
Tamakin?! You mean that?!
(話し声)
《土方:ﾊﾞｶな… 至るところに》
That can't be...it's everywhere...
こっ これは！ (近藤)おい ﾄｼ 何やってんだ？
It's...
Hey, Toshi. What're you doing?
早く 一緒に食おうぜ！
C'mon, let's eat. Sogo, Seizo-san, you guys want to join us?
おお 総悟！ 清蔵さんも 一緒にどうだい？
Hey! Kondo-san...Kondo-san's covered in an enormous amount of tamakin!
おい～ 近藤さんが…｡ 近藤さんがﾀﾏ菌の量が➡
ﾊﾝﾊﾟじゃねえぞ｡ ﾒﾁｬｸﾁｬ ﾅﾆを触ってたからでしょう｡
It's probably because he touches his thing an awful lot.
完全に 卵がふ化しています｡
The eggs have completely hatched.
あれはもう 近藤さんじゃありません｡
That's no longer Kondo-san. He's nothing but a walking, talking tamakin.
ただの ﾀﾏ菌です｡
ｸｯ… 元に戻す方法は？
How can we bring him back to normal?
厠革命… それしかありません！
A toilet revolution...it's the only way.
[Toilets]
That settles the installation of sensor-type faucets.
(清蔵) ｾﾝｻｰ式の手洗いは 導入決定｡
しかし 問題は まだ山積みです｡
However, there remains a mountain of problems.
見てください この床を｡
Look at this. We just cleaned it moments ago, but look how bad it is.
先ほど 掃除したのに もう この始末です！
多少のしぶきなら まだしも…｡
I can understand a few stray drops, but this completely missed the mark.
これは 完全に 的を外しています！
改めて見ると ひでえなぁ｡
Seeing it again, it certainly does look terrible.
おそらく 連れｼｮﾝによる影響でしょう｡
It's probably the result of using the toilet together.
複数で厠に入り 談笑するうちに 下がおろそかになり➡
When people go to the toilet in a group,
they talk and laugh and tend to forget about what's below,
あらぬ方向に 小便が飛んでいるのでしょう｡
causing urine to fly in all directions.
まず 連れｼｮﾝ禁止令を 布くことが弟一！
Our first priority will be to establish a "no group urination" rule.
(土方)任せろ 局中法度に加えておく｡
Leave that to me. I'll add it to our rules.
しかし たとえ１人でも まだ心配は ぬぐえません｡
However, even a single person is still cause for worry.
そうだ！ 便器に あらかじめ➡
I've got it!
What if we soil the urinal before they use it?
汚れをつけておく… というのは どうだ？
洋式便所で小便するときのことを 考えてみろ｡
Think about how you urinate in a Western-style toilet.
便器に汚れがついてると➡
If there's something stuck to the bowl...
無意識のうちに 小便で汚れを狙い撃ちし➡
you know how you unconsciously aim at it to shoot it off?
汚れを落とそうとしているときが あるだろう？
あの心理を利用して 便器に 狙いを集中させるようにするんだ｡
We'll use that psychology and make it so they'll aim into the urinal.
土方さん… さりげに 自分の恥ずかしいｸｾを➡
Hijikata-san, you've just casually revealed an embarrassing habit.
暴露してるんですが いっつも そんなことやってんですか？
Is that what you always do?
(土方)いや ｵﾚはやってないぞ｡
No, I don't do that. I heard about it somewhere.
なんか そんな話を聞いたっつうか…｡
(清蔵)いや しかし いいｱｲﾃﾞｱだと思いますよ｡
No, I think it's a great idea.
(沖田)よし じゃあ これなんてどうでしょうか？
Okay, then...
How about this?
(土方)ん？ 何だ総悟 それ？
Huh? What is that, Sogo?
それ 私のﾎｸﾛでしょうが～！
That's my mole!
いや 悪いなと思って➡
I felt bad about what I did, so I only pretended to flush it down.
流したふりして とっといたんでぃ｡
I was hoping I'd find a good use for it somewhere.
何か 有効なことに 役立てようと思って｡
どこが有効？
How is this a "good" use?!
人のﾎｸﾛ 小便で 狙い撃ちさせるつもりですか!?
You want someone to aim his urine at my mole?
(沖田)そうですか？ すいやせんでした｡
I see. Sorry about that.
(清蔵)だから流すな～！
Don't flush it down! You have no respect for a person's body parts!
人の肉体の一部を 何だと思ってるんだぁ!?
おい もう何でもいいからよ 適当に汚しとけよ｡
C'mon, never mind that. Dirty it up a bit. Anything will do.
汚れだったら 何でもいいからよ｡
ああ… じゃあ これで｡ (土方)どういう意味!?
Oh...then I'll use this.
What's the meaning of that?!
(沖田)真選組の汚れです｡
It's the dirt of the Shinsengumi.
Dirty is what you are on the inside! Quit monkeying around-take that off!
(土方)汚れてんのは ﾃﾒｴの腹ん中だろ！
ふざけんな はがせ！ あっ 誰か来た！ 皆さん隠れて！
Someone's coming. Hide!
どうでしょうかねぇ 効き目は？
Do you think it's going to work?
Don't be silly! That's not going to work!
ふざけんな あんなもん効くわけねえだろ！
(扉の開閉音)
Okay, they left.
(沖田)行きましたよ｡ ああ 失敗でさぁ｡
Oh...it didn't work.
ほ～ら見ろ｡ ｳﾝｺされてます｡
You see.
They did a number two.
どういうことぉぉ!? 効きすぎましたねぇ｡
What happened?!
It worked too well.
対象物に対する憎しみが 大きすぎたようです｡
It would seem their hatred of the object was too great.
こっちに至っては 写真が つき破られてますね｡
This photo has a hole poked through it.
(土方)どんな小便？ どんだけ嫌われてんだよ ｵﾚぁ!?
What kind of urine does that?! Do they hate me that much?!
きれいにしようってのに ｳﾝｺされちゃ かなわねえや｡
We can't have them doing number twos when we want them to clean up this place.
それに汚れじゃ 見落とされちゃ しまいですよ｡
And it's no use if they don't see it as dirt.
どうですか？ ここは 発想を逆転させましょう｡
What do you say we use reverse psychology?
小便を便器にさせるんじゃなく➡
We don't make them urinate in the urinal.
小便を 便器以外では できなくしましょう｡
We make it so that they can't urinate anywhere else.
(沖田)つまり 床に 小便を こぼしちゃいけない状況を➡
In other words,
we create a situation where they can't ever dribble urine on the floor.
作るんです｡ (土方)どんな状況だよ？
What kind of situation is that?!
あっ 誰か来た！
Someone's coming.
(隊士)ああ… もれそ…｡
Ah, I'm gonna pee my pants...
(沖田/清蔵)ﾊｧ… ﾊｧ… ﾊｧ…｡
ﾍｯ… ﾍﾍ…｡
お前 なかなかやんじゃねえかよ｡
You were pretty good.
ｸ… ｸｸ… お前こそ｡
You weren't bad yourself.
(沖田)地面から お天道様を 仰ぎ見るなんざ何年ぶりかな？
I wonder how many years it's been since I've seen the stars like this?
空って こんなに広かったっけ？
I'd forgotten the sky was this big.
(清蔵)たまには こういうのも 悪かねえかもな｡
It's kind of neat to do this sort of thing every once in a while.
誰が 小便できるかぁ～!!
Who'd be able to urinate?!
男どうしの友情に 水さすﾔﾂは いねえでしょう｡
No one would interrupt a friendly moment between two guys.
That's no good! In fact, it's infuriating.
(土方)うまくね～んだよ むしろ腹立つんだよ！
つうか ﾃﾒｴら これから毎回 厠に人来るたびに➡
Are you two planning to repeat that crummy skit of yours
every time someone comes to pee?!
その完成度の低いｺﾝﾄ 繰り広げるつもりか!?
じゃあ これなんてどうですか？
Then...
What if we put holes in this plywood sheet, so they can stick their...
このﾍﾞﾆﾔ板に穴をあけて ここに ﾅﾆを…｡
What sort of perverted play is this?!
何のﾌﾟﾚｲ!? お前 これ いろんなﾔﾂが➡
Listen, a lot of different guys are going to stick their things in!
この穴に ﾅﾆを ｾｯﾃｨﾝｸﾞするんだろうが!!
不衛生 極まりないわ!!
It's unsanitary!
They'll be fine with it.
大丈夫でさぁ 不快にならねえように➡
I'll draw a woman's face here so they won't be uncomfortable.
ここに 女の顔を…｡ (土方)おぃ…｡
Hey! Now it's turning into something totally different!
もう それ 別の何かになってんだろうが!!
不衛生だって 言ってんだろうが 心身ともに！
I told you, it's unsanitary! For both body and mind!
隈無 ｱﾝﾀも何か…｡
Kumanaku, say something...
Can you make the hole a little larger for me?
私は もう少し 穴を ﾃﾞｶめにしてもらえますか？
What're you adjusting the size for?! Forget the ego!
(土方) なに ﾃﾞｶさ調節してんだﾃﾒｴは！
見栄はってんじゃねえ！ んなことより 問題は穴より口だ!!
The problem is not the hole. It's the mouth!
(土方)こんなもん 放送できると思ってんのか！
Do you think we can broadcast this?!
I see. If that's the problem...
なるほど そういう問題でしたら…➡
裏に返しゃ ﾉｰﾌﾟﾛﾌﾞﾚﾑですぜ｡
If we turn it around, no problem.
Hey, that doesn't solve the sanitation issue at all!
(土方)おい それじゃあ 衛生面が まったく➡
(土方)解消されてねえだろうが！ (沖田)まぁまぁ｡
Now, now...
あっ！ 誰か来ました 隠れてください｡
Somebody's coming.
Hide.
[Two minutes later]
It's awfully quiet.
(土方)ずいぶん静かだな｡ なにやってるんだ？
What's he doing?
[Five minutes later]
(土方) いつになったら 出てくるんだよ｡
When's he going to leave? Take a peek.
おい ちょっと のぞいて見ろ｡
(近藤)抜けなく なっちゃった…｡
...I'm...stuck.
I don't know why.
《山崎:｢何故だかは わからない｡
何が理由なのかは わからないが ﾎﾞｸたち 真選組の屯所は突如➡
I don't know the reason,
but our Shinsengumi Headquarters was suddenly taken over by mysterious germs.
あの正体不明の菌に支配された｡
ある朝 目覚めると ﾎﾞｸらは 突然あの菌に襲われた｣》
Upon waking one morning,
we were attacked without warning by the germs.
♪♪～
《山崎:｢時期は確か 副長たちが厠革命が なんだと➡
It happened, I believe,
several days after the Vice-Chief began talking some nonsense
わけのわからないことを 言い始めて 数日後だったと思う｡
about a toilet revolution or something.
その行き過ぎた革命によって みんなは 厠に恐れをなして➡
Because of the excessiveness of the revolution,
everyone became afraid of going near the toilet.
寄り付かなくなった…｡
でも 生理現象は 誰にもとめられない｡
But no one can stop their bodily functions.
屯所内は 荒れに荒れた｡
Headquarters became a horrible mess.
それは もはや無法地帯 神も 仏もないくらいまでに➡
It was a lawless area, with no God or Buddha. A wretched hell.
荒れ果てた 地獄の風景だった｡
もしかしたら あれが 原因だったのかもしれない…｣》
Perhaps that was to blame.
♪♪～
Wrath...
《｢そう これは怒りだ｡
Yes, it was wrath...
厠の神様が 厠を冒涜したﾎﾞｸたちに 怒りの鉄槌を下したのだ｣》
the toilet god's wrath brought down a hammer of retribution
upon us for desecrating the toilet.
♪♪～
My god...is this our headquarters?!
なんてこった… これが ｵﾚたちの屯所か!?
清蔵さん 結局のところ どうすれば いいんですかい？
Seizo-san, what do we do?
Cut it down at its roots!
元を断つ！ つまり菌の発生源を 直接 叩くしかありません｡
In other words, we have no choice but to attack the germs' origins.
発生源!? 厠です 厠こそ 諸悪の根源です！
Origins?
The toilet! The toilet is the root of all evil!
Let's go, Hijikata-san.
行きやしょう 土方さん！ よし！
Okay.
突撃だ ｺﾗｧ～！
Charge!
♪♪～
[Toilet]
ひでえ！ どこが小便器だか大便器だかの➡
My god!
Can't even tell where the urinals and toilet bowls are...
見分けも つきやしねえ…｡ (近藤)ｸﾞｫ～…！
What's that?!
あれは！ ｺｱです！ あれこそが ﾀﾏ菌そのもの!!
The core! That's the tamakin!
ﾀﾏ菌そのものだって…!?
You say it's the tamakin, but...
It's probably because he touches his thing an awful lot.
((清蔵:ﾒﾁｬｸﾁｬ ﾅﾆを 触ってたからでしょう｡
The eggs have completely hatched.
完全に卵が ふ化しています｡
That's no longer Kondo-san.
あれは もう 近藤さんじゃありません｡
ただの ﾀﾏ菌です))
He's nothing but a walking, talking tamakin.
Then that means it's...!
ってことは ｱｲﾂは…！
ｸﾞｫ～…！
♪♪～
近藤さん!! ｸﾞｫ～…！
Kondo-san!
《山崎:｢あれから２ヶ月｡
Two months later.
ﾀﾏ菌は ものすごい勢いで繁殖し かぶき町をのみ込み➡
The tamakin grew at an incredible rate.
It swallowed Kabukicho
ついには 大江戸全体を 覆いつくすに至った…｣》
and eventually enveloped all of Edo.
[Shut Down]
♪♪～
《人類と ﾀﾏ菌による➡
A fierce battle of survival began between the human race and tamakin.
熾烈な生存競争が 始まった！》
[Shin]
♪♪～
(近藤)ｺﾝﾄﾞｵｵﾑ～!!
♪♪～
(土方)あれは…!?
That's...!
Kondoooo
[Note: Parody of the Ohmu from Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind.]
ｺﾝﾄﾞｵｵｵﾑ!!
ooohmu!
近藤さん!? すげえ数でっせ！
Kondo-san...?!
There's so many.
(清蔵)最悪の事態です！
It's the worst possible scenario.
Kumanaku!
[Note: Parody of the costumes from Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind.]
(土方)隈無！
I'm guessing that the cells rapidly continued to divide.
おそらく 急激なｽﾋﾟｰﾄﾞで 細胞分裂を 繰り返した結果➡
母体である 局長の細胞組織が そのｽﾋﾟｰﾄﾞに ついていけず➡
The host's-our chief's-metabolism couldn't keep up,
母体そのものが 分裂してしまったのでしょう！
resulting in the host himself dividing.
そして この暴走は ﾚﾐﾝｸﾞの集団暴走と 同じだ！
This stampede is identical to the run of the lemmings.
(清蔵)世界を 破壊しつくすまで この暴走は 止まらないでしょう！
This stampede won't stop until it destroys the entire world.
You idiot! Think of something! This all started because you...
ﾊﾞｶ野郎！ 何か 手を考えろ！ もとはといえば お前が…！
(着弾音)
(松平)ﾊﾟｯ！ 破壊神 松平 片栗虎 見参！
Katakuriko Matsudaira, The God of Destruction, has arrived!
[Note: Parody of a costume from Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind.]
目標 わけの わからねえ 巨大 ｲﾓ虫！ 進め～ おら～!!
Our targets are those god-knows-what caterpillars! Forward!
松平の とっつぁん！
Pops Matsudaira.
砲撃 開始～!!
Fire cannons!
♪♪～
(近藤ｵｳﾑたち)おりゃ～!!
どわ～っ!! (土方たち)とっつぁん！
Pops!
総悟！ こうなりゃあ➡
Sogo...It's up to you and me-
真選組 結成以来の同志である ｵﾚたちが 止めるしかねえ！
Shinsengumi members from the very beginning-to stop this.
そうですかい｡ そういうことなら こっちも 奥の手を出しましょう｡
Is that so? In that case, I'll use my secret ability.
実は あっしは 世界で最も 邪悪な一族の 末裔なんでさあ…｡
You see I am the descendent of the most evil tribe ever to walk the Earth.
[Note: Parody of Giant Warrior from Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind.]
♪♪～
(山崎)なんか 溶けてますよ！
I think he's melting!
It's been getting hot recently.
最近 暑くなってきましたからね｡
That's irrelevant!
そういう問題か！
♪♪～
(爆発音)
♪♪～
(近藤)ｺﾝﾄﾞｵｵｵﾑ!!
やった！ これなら いけるかも!!
He did it! We might have a chance.
Okay, once more!
よし もう一発 いけ～!!
♪♪～
お～い！ 一発で 終わりかよ!!
Hey! You're spent after just one shot?!
(近藤)ｺﾝﾄﾞｵｵｵﾑ～!!
副長!!
Vice-Chief!
[Note: Parody of the glider from Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind.]
♪♪～
近藤さん！ 止まってくれ!!
Kondo-san! Please stop!
Kondo-Ohmu.
ｺﾝﾄﾞｵｵｵﾑ!!
Kondo-san!
近藤さん!!
(２人)副長!!
Vice-Chief!
♪♪～
Vice-Chief...
はっ…！
[Toilet]
あっ…｡
[Preview]
Could you be...Mayo-sama?
The next episode... "They Say Soy Sauce On Pudding Tastes Like Sea Urchin,
But Soy Sauce On Pudding Only Tastes Like Pudding and Soy Sauce."
[Chief of Police Katakuriko Matsudaira's daughter, Kuriko Matsudaira makes an appearance after a long absence.]
[The fateful reunion with Mayo 13. (Administrative message) Mu-san, thank you for your hard work! See you again next time!]