Now listen, yo!
People put your guns up
Mazu ore ga run dat
Hashirimawatte yatsura o gun shot
Brand new sound sou still survival
Here come the sound boy kono sekai ni ikiro
Chiryoku tairyoku to un ga mau ze! Flow
Fukuranda ataman naka wa zakkubaran nan da
Savannah de Banna ni wanpan
Kantan knockout kan kan kan
One time for your mind ikinuke
Around the world
Tsukimatou no sa itsu no itami mo
Kedakai kami no mawari mo ima karimono
Makareta tane mo hana sakeba dare no
Ikite uchikomu shinnen no ya o more more more
Ikisaki ni yasuragi wa nai
Tachi na sa don't give up the fight
Ima sou kono shunkan mo die die die
Big shooter ikiisoide blazing
Beat you up kirihiraite break
Shot shooter ikiisoida crazy
Shoujun au shikin kyori de break
Big shooter ikiisoide blazing
Beat you up kirihiraite break
Shot shooter ikiisoida crazy
Shoujun au shikin kyori de break
（男性）もう少しヒントくださいよ
Can you give us more of a hint?
Okay, write down your answers, now!
（司会）さあ 答えをお書きください どうぞ
What?
If you watch the video closely, you'll get the answer.
（司会）ＶＴＲをよく見ていれば 分かりますよ
What is...
Let's make sure we make it home,
（加藤(かとう)）必ず帰ろう みんなで
all of us.
（岸本(きしもと)）うん そうだね
Yes, let's do that.
Awesome!
（欣二(きんじ)）すっげえ！ ヘヘッ…
（康介(こうすけ)）ヘヘヘヘッ…
（計(けい)）やっべえ…
Uh-oh!
My suit's not here.
スーツが ない！
What am I gonna do?
どうする？
Damn it!
（計）ちくしょう！
I'll Kill You Without a Moment's Hesitation
Please go eliminate this target now, you bastards. The Suzuki Alien Traits: Strong, refreshing, bird. Likes: Birds, sweets. Catch phrase: "Ha, ha, ha!"
Please go eliminate this target now, you bastards. The Suzuki Alien Traits: Strong, refreshing, bird. Likes: Birds, sweets. Catch phrase: "Ha, ha, ha!" Go to the foyer one at a time
（加藤）玄関に１人ずつ行って スーツを着てくれ
Please go eliminate this target now, you bastards. The Suzuki Alien Traits: Strong, refreshing, bird. Likes: Birds, sweets. Catch phrase: "Ha, ha, ha!" And put on your suit.
Are you the leader here or something?
（鉄男(てつお)）お前 ここのリーダーか何かかよ？
No, I'm not, but...
（加藤）そうじゃねえけど
Then quit bossing people around.
（春哉(はるや)）だったら偉そうに ああだ こうだ言ってんじゃねえよ
着るか こんなの だっせえ！
You think I'm gonna wear this?
It's so lame.
It would be better if you put them on.
（岸本）着たほうがいいですよ
Well, where are we?
（カヨ） あの… ここは どこなんですか？
Kato...
（計）加藤
着たあとに教えます 帰れる確率が上がる
I'll tell you after you put them on.
You'll have a better chance of making it home.
Kato, well...
加藤 あの…
Please put them on.
着てください （カヨ）はぁ…
Like we said,
（康介）だからよ 山田(やまだ)星人なんて関係ねえっつうの
this Yamada Alien stuff doesn't concern us.
It's Suzuki, the Suzuki Alien!
鈴木(すずき)だ 鈴木星人
Now don't go correcting him with a straight face.
（計） マジな顔して訂正してんじゃねえ
What's more important is my suit...
それより俺のスーツ…
Kato...
加藤 （加藤）うん？
（鉄男）おい （計）あっ…
Hey!
（鉄男）お前 さっき このスーツで 生き死にが決まるって言ったよな？
You just said these suits can determine whether we live or die, right?
Yeah...
You also said that you aren't the leader here, right?
（鉄男）ここの リーダーじゃねえとも言ったよな？
（加藤）何が言いたいんだ？
What are you getting at?
I have to make sure to get these guys home.
俺は こいつらを 連れて帰んなくちゃなんねえ
I'm like their leader, see?
こいつらの リーダーみたいなもんだからな
ほかのヤツらは知ったこっちゃねえ ただ これだけは言っておくぜ
I could care less about the rest of you,
but I'll tell you this:
こいつら３人が スーツを着るかどうかは俺が決める
I'll decide whether these three wear the suits or not.
今度 命令こいたら… （加藤）どうする気だ？
Next time you try to give us orders...
You'll do what?
鈴木何とかより先に てめえをつぶす
I'll take you out before I do anything to that Suzuki-whatever.
（西(にし)）フフッ…
Hey, say something to Tetsu!
（春哉） おい 鉄ちゃんに何とか言えよ
なんとか着るように言ってほしい
I'd like you to tell them to wear them.
It's not an order;
命令じゃない お願いだ
it's a request.
Shit...
(: AHC OTAK
（カヨ）必ず連れて帰るからね もうちょっと待っててね
I'll make sure to get you home, just wait a little while longer.
Grandma, is this mine?
（亮太(りょうた)） おばあちゃん これ 僕のかな？
Why, it is.
あら ホントだ 子供用もあるのかね
I guess they have kid's sizes too.
ちゃんと抗菌してあるのかね？ あんた 肌かぶれやすいから
I hope it's been disinfected.
Your skin breaks out in rashes easily.
What are you, stupid?
（西）バッカじゃねえの
I said, I'm not putting this on.
（春哉） だから 着ねえって こんな物(もん)
そうだよな 普通 そうだ
Yeah, normally no one would.
（春哉） 何だよ？ 鉄ちゃん 着んのかよ？
What are you saying? Are you gonna wear it, Tetsu?
No, it's just...
いや ただ…
What if this isn’t a normal situation? Then what?
もし 今 普通の 状態じゃないとしたら どうよ？
バッカじゃねえの？ （鉄男）そうだよな
What are you, stupid?
Yeah, you're right.
まあ お前らに任せるわ 好きにしろや
Well, I'll leave it up to you guys.
You can do whatever you want.
That's what I was going to do from the beginning.
（春哉）最初から そのつもりだよ 鉄ちゃんは？
What about you, Tetsu?
Don't tell me you're gonna put it on.
（春哉）おい 着んのかよ？ （鉄男）着ねえよ
No, I'm not.
Of course not.
（春哉）当ったり前だって
So you're not gonna put it on?
（加藤）着ないのかよ？ （北条(ほうじょう)）こんなん着て外出れっかよ
I wouldn't be caught dead outside in one of these.
Before long you'll have to leave this place whether you want to or not.
そのうち イヤでも出なきゃならなくなるんだ
それに イヤでも 着替えなきゃならなくなるし
And you'll have to change your clothes whether you like it or not.
I can't put it on. It's too embarrassing.
着れねえよ 恥ずかしい
Hey, that busty babe's gonna change clothes.
おい あの巨乳 着替えるぞ
みたいだな ヘヘヘヘッ…
That's what it looks like.
ああ？ おい どこ行くんだよ？
Where are you going?
You can't go outside.
外出れねえぞ （欣二）ああ 便所
Huh? To the can.
Yeah, to take a shit.
Oh, really?
ああ あっ そう… じゃ 俺も
Well, then, guess I'll go too.
Please...
（加藤）お願いです 着てください
Please put them on.
でも 孫は ともかく 私なんかが こんな格好…
I don't know about my grandson,
but I, for one, couldn't possibly wear such a...
我慢できねえ
I can't hold it any longer...
ンンッ… プハッ…
What's with this? It's so tight.
（岸本）なに？ これ キッツ…
They're huge!
（康介）でけえ！ （岸本）えっ？
You don't have to put that on.
それ着なくていいよ なあ？
Right, guys?
It's okay to put it on...
着てもいいけどよ やることやってからな
AFTER we're done with you.
サイズは それぞれの人に 合わせてあるみたいなんです
It appears as though the suits are made to fit each person.
But...
（カヨ）ですけど…
おい 加藤 （加藤）う… うん？
Hey, Kato.
Well, actually, I...
俺さ 実は…
（加藤） どうかした？ 計ちゃ… あっ…
Is something wrong, Kei?
Those guys...
（加藤）あいつら… （計）おい 加藤
Hey, Kato!
（欣二）ウワッ… （康介）あっ… 何だよ？
What the?!
（岸本）あっ こら！
Hey!
ンッ… また もう…
Not again!
Oh, that scared the SHIT out of me! What's with this dog?!
あ～ ビビった… 何だ？ この犬
ヘヘッ… ＯＬにでも飼われてたんかな？
I wonder if he was owned by a working girl or something?
余計 興奮してきた
That turns me on even more...
えっ？ 鉄ちゃん…
Tetsu!
やめとけって （春哉）なんでだよ？
Knock it off.
Why should we?
女房持ちは あっち行ってろよ！ （鉄男）関係ねえ
Get lost, Mr. L-Have-a-Wife!
That has nothing to do with this.
It doesn't matter whether I have a wife or not.
女房がいようが いまいが関係ねえ
おっと…
（鉄男）こんなことしてる場合じゃ ねえだろう
Now's not the time to be doing stuff like this.
Wow, Kishimoto's buck-naked!
うわぁ 岸本 すっぽんぽんだ！
You've gotta be kiddin' me?!
マジかよ？
Tetsu, you actually believe this stuff about the Sato Alien?
鉄ちゃん 信じてんのか？ 佐藤(さとう)星人
It's Suzuki.
鈴木だ （計）か… 加藤…
Kato...
鉄ちゃんさ
Tetsu, why don't you just give up acting like our leader already?!
いいかげんにリーダーづら やめてくんねえかな？
（春哉）こんなもん 信じてんじゃねえ！ マジかよ？
Don't believe this shit! Get real!
そうは言ってねえだろう けどよ…
I didn't say I did, but...
帰ってもな 二度と 俺らの前 走んじゃねえぞ こら！
When we get home,
I better not catch you riding in front of us again, punk!
It's okay for us to wear clothes on top of this, right?
（北条） 上に服 着ていいんだよな？
Yeah...
Tetsu, what are you, stupid?
鉄ちゃん バカじゃねえの？
Let him do what he wants.
放っとけ あんなヤツ シカト シカト
Forget him.
（計）ヤバイ みんな着てる
Oh, shit...
Everyone's got them on.
このままだと… 俺 死ぬ？
At this rate, I'm gonna die.
What am I gonna do?
（計）どうする？ 考えろ！
Think...
No way...
まさか 持って帰ったのか？
Don't tell me you took it home?
That's so lame!
だせえ… ださすぎ
What a lame-o!
Kei...
計ちゃん…
All right, it's for sure, one man dead.
（西）はい １名死亡…
決定～！
おい まただぜ
Hey, it happened again!
（店員Ｂ）ああ？ お菓子の カプセル盗んでく幽霊ってやつ？
What?
You mean the ghost that steals the capsule candy?
（店員Ａ）ああ ほら
Look...
You're always pinching them for yourself, aren't you?
（店員Ｂ）お前 いっつも がめてんじゃねえの？
俺 お菓子も おまけも 興味ねえもんよ
I have no interest in either the candy or the prizes.
It's got to be a ghost or something.
（店員Ａ）絶対 幽霊か何かだって （店員Ｂ）はいはい
Whatever you say...
Bike Monthly
故障かな？ （店員Ａ）違うって
I wonder if it's broken?
No, I'm telling you it's...
Color Copies 100 yen
Look, over there!
ほら あれ…
It's from the last customer, right?
（店員Ｂ）前の客のだろう ちゃんとレジ打っとけって
Go on and ring it up.
What kind of ghost would pay for his stuff and leave?
金払ってく幽霊が どこにいんだよ？
I'm telling you, it's definitely a ghost!
（店員Ａ）いいや 絶対 幽霊だって
Monday Watermelon Refreshing AAO!
Kei...
（加藤）計ちゃん スーツ…
Your suit...
ハハッ… 忘れてきちまった
I forgot it.
マジかよ？ （康介）あいつ 泣いてるぜ
You gotta be kiddin' me!
He's crying!
Maybe you'd better put them on.
（鉄男） 着たほうが いいかもしんねえぜ
Shut up!
うるせえよ！ 着れるか …んな物
Like we'd wear that!
（計）こうなったら あいつらのスーツを…
Since it's come down to this, I should grab their suits.
You've got to be joking!
（加藤）マジかよ？
Pretty soon, people will start being transported now, won't they?
もうすぐ送られんの 始まっちまうんじゃねえのか？
Kurono...
玄野(くろの)君…
Why didn't you say anything earlier?
なんで もっと早く 言ってくれなかったんだ？
I tried to tell you many times!
何度も言おうとしたじゃねえかよ
（ドアの開く音） （欣二）どこ行くんだ？
Where are you going?
ああ？ 今度はマジで おしっこ
This time I really am going to take a leak.
All right...
（計）よし 今なら いける
I can go for it now.
Isn't there something that can be done?
（岸本）どうにかなんないの？
さあ？
I don't know.
（計）も… もうちょい…
Just a little bit more...
（計）あっ… やべえ…
Crap...
That's theft!
それ泥棒じゃん
Hey, you!
（春哉）はぁ？ てめえ なにパクろうとしてんだ！
What do you think you're doing stealing from me?
But you're not going to wear it, right?
だって 着ないんだろう？
So what if I'm not?! Does that mean it's okay for you to swipe it?
着なきゃ人のパクっていいのかよ？
ああ？ オラッ！ （殴る音）
That's probably how it would turn out.
（計）…てなことになりそうだな
Just as I thought, it'd be too hard to steal one.
やっぱ 盗むのムリか…
Damn it! I'm in deep trouble now.
くそ！ マジやべえ…
（加藤）貸してやってくれないか？ 計ちゃんに
Won't you lend yours to Kei?
What?
はぁ？ 何こいてんだ？ こら
What the hell are you jabbering about, huh?
Kato...
加藤…
If you aren't going to wear it, there's nothing I can do about it.
（加藤）着ないんなら しかたない
だったら せめて 貸してやってほしいんだ
So at the very least, I'd like you to lend him yours.
Like hell!
（春哉）誰が！ これ 俺んだぜ
This is mine.
Let him borrow it, Haruya.
貸してやれよ 春哉 （春哉）てめえは黙ってろ！
You just shut your mouth!
Whether I decide to wear it or not, it's still mine.
着ようが着まいが俺の物だ
Like hell I'll let him borrow it!
誰が貸すかよ （加藤）だけど…
But...
It's no use.
（西）ムダだって （加藤）あっ…
Another person's suit is only a set of clothes.
他人のスーツじゃ ただの服だ
（計）ゲッ… それじゃ やっぱ俺 死ぬじゃん
If that's the case, then I'm dead meat after all.
There's got to be something,
何かあるだろう？ 計ちゃんが生き残れる方法
some way Kei can survive.
Idiot!
バ～カ これ以上 教えっかよ
Like I'd tell you any more than that!
あっ… あんのか？ 教えろ！ 教えてくれ！
Is there?! Talk! C'mon, tell me!
“教えてください”だろう？ （計）ウッ…
It's "Tell me please," isn't it?
Tell me please.
教えてください…
（西）どうしよっかな
I dunno, should I?
Quit jerking me around, you little...
（計） ざけんな てめえ！ 教えろ！
Talk!
潔く死ね （計）この野郎！
Die with some dignity!
Why, you!
You're dead! Each and every one of you!
お前ら みんな 死んでんだよ！
Or something like that.
てこともあるかな …なんてね
Just kidding!
You little brat!
このガキ！ ンッ… 離せよ こら！
Let go of me, you!
（握る音） （春哉）ウッ… 痛(いて)え！
Ow!
What the hell are you?!
何だ？ こいつ ンンッ…
（西）ムカつくぜ ホントに
You guys really piss me off.
Even if people the likes of you were dead,
お前らなんかが死んだってな 世の中には何ひとつ関係ねえんだよ
it'd have absolutely no bearing on the world at large.
So, there's no point in carrying on about whether you'll live or die.
だからさ 死ぬの生きるのって 騒いでも意味ないんだ 全然な
No point at all!
お前も死んでるっていうのかよ？
So, you're saying you're dead too?
教えない
I'm not going to tell you.
ここにいるのは 仲間なんかじゃねえし
The people here aren't your teammates,
だから リーダーなんて必要ない
so there's no need for a leader.
We're all rivals,
全員がライバルなんだよ 生き残れるかどうかのな
rivals competing for survival.
"Let's all make it back?" Don't give me that crap.
なにが“全員で帰ろう”だよ
ふざけんな この偽善者が
You hypocrite.
Last time you head-butted a yakuza, didn't you?
（西）お前 前回 ヤーさんに 頭突き食らわしたろう？
全員で帰ろうってヤツが なんで暴力振るうんだよ？
Why would someone who wants us all to make it back strong-arm people?
Gimme a break!
ふざけんな ああいうのをな 暴力衝動っていうんだよ
They call stuff like that violent impulses.
Have a discussion, a discussion.
話し合いしろよ 話し合い 頭突きとかじゃなくてさ
Not head-butting.
And you there, Miss Melons!
（西）それから そこの巨乳 （岸本）なによ？
Yeah, what?
"Isn't there something that can be done?"
どうにかなんないの？ すんげえムカついたぜ
That really got my goat.
乳がでかいだけで 自分じゃ どうすることも できねえじゃんか
All you've got is a huge rack.
Otherwise, you're as helpless as a newborn, aren't you?
そういう女がさ 人に指図とかできるわけ？
You mean to tell me a woman like that can go bossing people around?
何にもできないくせに ああ？
Even though you can't do anything for yourself? Huh?
If you get in a pinch, you think he'll get you out of it somehow, don't you?
いざとなったら こいつが なんとかしてくれる…
そう思ってるだろう？
Don't you?
思ってるだろう？ （岸本）ンンッ…
（西）おい ちんこ おっ勃(た)ち男君 （計）あっ…
Hey, Mr. Hard On!
Are you that scared of dying?
そんなに死ぬの怖いか？ 泣いてんじゃねえよ みっともない
You shouldn't be crying. It's disgraceful!
Before, I thought you had a little bit of potential,
前は ちょっとだけ 見どころあるって思ったけどさ
訂正 お前が いちばん先に死ね
but I take it back!
You ought to be the first to die!
（計）こ… 怖くて悪いかよ？
So what if I was scared.
I'm telling you it's disgraceful.
（西） みっともないって言ってるんだ 俺は そんなの平気だよ
That kind of stuff doesn't faze me.
Hey, kid! Stop bawling!
そこのガキ 泣くな！
（カヨ） あの… どうか もう少しお静かに
I'm sorry, could you please be a little more quiet?
フン！ あんたら２人が いちばんヤバイよな
You two are on the shakiest ground.
You have almost no chance of survival.
生き残れる確率 ほぼゼロ （カヨ）そんな…
Oh, dear...
You're just like Miss Melons here.
巨乳と同じ あんたらは 誰かに頼らなきゃ 絶対 死ぬ
You'll die for sure unless you rely on someone else.
Who'll you depend on?
誰に頼る？ 俺は ごめんだからな
It's not going to be me.
ついでにね そうやって 孫 甘やかすのって―
Oh, and another thing.
You spoil your grandchild like that to satisfy yourself.
ばばあの自己満足なんだよ
孫が かわいいからって 性格ゆがませていいの？ ああ？
Is it okay to warp his personality just because he's adorable? Huh?
He won't grow up to be a respectable adult.
ロクな大人にならないよ
そんとき あんたは死んでるだろうけどさ
But by that time you'll probably be dead.
But that doesn't mean that it's okay to release a warped fish into society, does it?
だからって 社会に ゆがんだ魚 放流していいってことないでしょう
Am I wrong? Am I?
違う？ 違う？
Honestly, this isn't even funny!
（西）まったく 冗談じゃねえよ
ゾクはゾクでバカみたいに リーダー争いしてるしさ
And then we've got the bikers, all fighting like idiots over who's the boss.
What?
なに？ （西）フン！ たかがゾクだろう？
You're just a bunch of bikers.
The garbage of society, garbage.
社会のゴミだよ ゴミ フッ…
それをさ 変に 男気みたいなの振りまいちゃって
But you have to go and bring this macho crap into it.
ゴミにリーダーも へったくれもないんだよ このゴミ
A leader for garbage, my ass!
You garbage!
And you, I bet you're the type the girls squeal about, aren't you?
（西）お前 女にキャーキャー 言われるタイプだよな？
Your kind are all a bunch of dimwits.
そういうのに限って 頭ん中 空っぽなんだよ
Have you heard of the web and websites?
お前 サイトとかウェブとか知ってる？
Have you ever used a cell phone for stuff besides text messages asking women out?
携帯 女誘うメール送る以外に 使ったことある？
Yeah, I know what you're talking about.
…んなもん知ってる
あっ そう じゃ 聞くけどさ
Oh, really?
Well, let me ask you this.
When you read a newspaper, where do you start?
新聞読むとき どっち側から読む？ （北条）テレビ欄から
From the TV listings.
（西） バッカじゃねえの？ それ逆じゃん
What are you, stupid?
You've got it all backwards!
まあ バカな当て字しか知らない ゾクのゴミどもよりは―
But just by reading the newspaper,
you're probably better off than those biker thugs
who only use ridiculous word combinations because they sound cool.
新聞読むだけ マシかもしれないけどさ
出た？ （春哉）当たったのか？
Did it fire?
Did you hit him?
I don't know.
分かんねえ 音しかしなかったし
It only made a sound.
It doesn't matter whether a bullet comes out or not!
弾が出ようが出まいが関係ねえ
You just had to go and shoot your mouth off!
言いたい放題 言ってくれたな！ （加藤）やめろ！ そいつは…
Stop!
That's...
The real thing?
本物？
I'll kill you!
ぶっ殺す！
What are you doing pointing a gun at me?
なに 俺に銃向けてんだ？ こら！
HUH?!
So they are toys after all.
やっぱ おもちゃなのか？ （計）ちが… これは…
No, this is...
タイムラグがあるんだ！
There's a time lag!
Huh?
Why, you, don't you mess with the boys!
てめえ ゾクなめんなよ
Listen up, you idiots.
よく聞け バカども
（西） 俺に銃向けたら ソッコー殺す
If any of you point a gun at me, I'll kill you without a moment's hesitation.
You got that?
いいか？ 俺に銃向けたら ソッコー殺すからな！
If any of you point a gun at me, I'll kill you without a moment's hesitation!
ちっちゃい脳みそに よく記憶しとけ！
Imprint that on your tiny brains!
And the rest of you, anyone who slows me down, I'll kill you with no remorse.
あと ほかのヤツらも 俺の足引っ張るヤツも容赦なく殺す
Especially you.
特に お前
ほらな メチャメチャ頼ってる
See? She's totally relying on you.
You were shot.
（加藤）撃たれたのに―
なぜ お前は何ともないんだ？ （西）もう質問には答えない
How come nothing happened to you?
I'm not answering any more questions.
Is it because of your suit?
（加藤）そのスーツか
ガンツ いつまでも引っ張ってんじゃねえ！
Gantz! Quit draggin your feet!
Please go eliminate this target now, you bastards. The Suzuki Alien Traits: Strong, refreshing, bird. Likes: Birds, sweets. Catch phrase: "Ha, ha, ha!" Gantz! Quit draggin your feet!
Please go eliminate this target now, you bastards. The Suzuki Alien Traits: Strong, refreshing, bird. Likes: Birds, sweets. Catch phrase: "Ha, ha, ha!"
Get this show on the road!
早く始めてくれ！
Please go Get this show on the road!
Please go
Kei!
計ちゃん！
（鉄男）なっ… （春哉）おい！
Hey!
（カヨ）大丈夫
Please go
Straight from the get-go...
いきなりかよ…
Hajimari wa dare demo junshin muku na baby
Nigai mi kajitte mo kujikecha dame yo walk straight
Satta koto da kedo ame no naka zukizuki itamu yo
I'm lonely as floating ice
Yaseta yubi ni kiss o shite
Naita anata o omoidasu yo
Kore de owari da to shite mo
Saigo no kiss wa wasurenai yo
Wasurenai yo
Kare no kiss o wasurenai yo
Who the hell is that?
（鉄男）何だ？ あいつ ああ？ なに こっち見てんだよ？
What are you staring at me for?
Oh, so you're a robot, aren't you?
あっ てめえ ロボットだろう？ ああ… よくできてんじゃん
You're really well-made.
Next time: "Yuzo?"
次回 “裕三(ゆうぞう)君？”