At 11:12 AM 7/8/99 -0400, John Kim wrote:

>A lot of people are afraid
>of criticizing how someone else is playing, and so they never
>even make suggestions that could improve the person's play.

This is bard related and not just general because bards are the grease that
makes the whole machine run smoother, eh?

This is indeed a problem. Personally I tend to be either too quiet or too
blunt. Handling people well is not one of my real life skills.

Nevertheless, I find myself, as one or another of my characters, grouped
with people who range from annoying through inept to disaster. I have no
doubt in some cases they think similarly of me, but of course they're
wrong. :-)}

I always feel responsible to explain if I refuse to join or want to leave.
Sometimes I feel responsible to try to educate. What I'm trying to learn
to do is make the attempt to help and educate but not to get into an
attempt to teach a pig to sing. There's just no use in continuing to annoy
the pig.

Sometimes I'd also rather solo or watch for what looks like a better group.
I don't like to hurt feelings, but it seems unavoidable in so social a game.

For example, playing my rogue I found myself trying to instruct a somewhat
inept, immature, annoying bard. Eventually I concluded that he simply
wasn't going to get it. Now I find I have little option but to ignore or
deflect him when he pops up. A few days ago he recognized my rogue and
accosted her as a different character, saying his bard's name. That so
offended my sense of being in character that I completely ignored him.

I guess what I have to learn to do is make a quick, graceful exit with
little or no explanation, after I've determined, to what extent I can,
whether a situation calls for education or my absence.

Bob/Thrush