Your concerns really struck a nerve with me and I'd like to share some of my
observations about life as a bard. As mentioned in previous reply, we
bards are actually very good soloists. When things get hairy, we have the
accellerando - a near full-proff excape route. In the situation you
described, if I was getting hit hard and hit a lot, I'd hit accellerando at
about 3 bars of health. This is because you slow down below 2 bars and you
may need that extra bar to get some distance between you and the orcs.
Always have accellerando hot-keyed.

Second, lament is a great spell but it can, as you have learned, fail.
However, the lower the level of creature is compared to you, the more likely
it is to succeed. Never use it on a white or higher con. It will fail way
too often. But, if they all con green or a low blue, you could solo a camp
and clean it out.

Third, our greatest power is in grouping, but grouping is risky. It is a
high-trust situation. Be very careful who you group with and guage how well
you can trust them. I might group with a group like you had described, but
I would not trust them to save my butt if I got in trouble and at the first
sign of trouble, I'd run. Only when they have shown that they can be
counted on to keep me alive when the going got rough would I let myself get
low in health. I die more frequently in a group then solo because I am
still too trusting and eager to jump into danger to save someone whose
stupidity got them into trouble... usually failing and dieing along side of
them.

Be up front with them about this though. Make sure they understand that
since you don't know them well, and your life is dear to you, you will do
what you have to to protect it until some trust and teamwork has developed.