/**
 * file: journal_karbytes_06january2025.txt
 * type: plain-text
 * date: 05_JANUARY_2025
 * author: karbytes
 * license: PUBLIC_DOMAIN
 */

The following thoughts (listed in bullet point format in this note) pertain to my chronic experience of being intensively stalked, harassed, and tortured via stealthy "mind reading" and "mind controlling" technology used against me by law enforcement or military such that I am effectively being pressured against my will into becoming suicidal or harming myself or others after my sanity is worn down from inescapable and intense bullying (which is difficult for me to prove is actually taking place (which is why, for my sake, I generally avoid broaching this topic out of fear that it will undermine my brand and ability to function alongside other people (who generally seem to condone that such covert gang stalking and bullying continue indefinitely regardless of the costs))). Perhaps karbytes is too much of an inconvenience for The Patriarchy (or, alternatively named, The Establishment) to allow to have the same degree of freedom and respect as most other people in time and place within human civilization where karbytes originated. Hence (and while knowing that The Establishment has the power to maim, murder, torture, and incarcerate karbytes (due to the fact that The Establishment is so monolithic, wealthy, and technogically and militaristically powerful to the extent that The Establishment can essentially do whatever it wants to)), karbytes is no longer making a concerted effort to fight against The Establishment (especially in terms of opposing its terrorist attacks waged on karbytes (who is a lone individual and arguably a "vulnerable adult)) simply because such efforts generally seem to be in vain and also seem to reinforce and encourage The Establishment's totalitarian and inhumane treatment of karbytes (while The Establishment and its many supporters justify such marginalization and undermining of karbytes' well-being as necessary for protecting traditionalist or politically conservative ways of life from going out of vogue).

- You only matter if enough of the right people treat you like you matter (and such people cannot be yourself).

- I idealize the idea of being as non-needy for other people's attention and resources as possible (while maintaining my survival and comfort to an extent which is tolerable and which does not draw unnecessary attention to myself from other people (and I think other people are easily provoked into feeling envious and spiteful towards me for acting like I have too good of a status compared to where those people think I deserve to be relegated within some socioeconomic hierarchy where people only enjoy nice things as a consequence of being approved of by sufficiently many people other than themselves who are in good enough standing with that hierarchy or as a consequence of suffering some kind of routine personal loss or adversity in exchange for extending one's eligibility to continue existing in relatively dignified (and tolerable) circumstances)).

- You are technically not supposed to have self-esteem nor even autonomy. Instead, what you are supposed to value having is esteem solely from being enmeshed with some organization comprised of multiple people adhering to the prevalent hierarchy which necessarily places some people at higher positions of authority, wealth, and even right to consistently implement well-being enhancing and maintaining practices. (Those at lower socioeconomic ranks are implicitly discouraged from practicing exemplary self-care).

- One thing I am particularly motivated to do (and take pleasure and pride in) is using my well-honed English speaking and writing ability to precisely (and succinctly) as possible define literally everything (or anything). What is very disconcerting for me is noticing a recurrent trend of people other than myself reacting to my attempts to express myself in terms which are intended by me to be maximally articulate, factually accurate, and daresay even original with hostility and smothering attempts to censor and sabotage me. I heard such people attempt to justify their confrontational and stifling behavior towards me as necessary for preventing me from acting too high up in their socioeconomic hierarchy instead of at a more lowly position like what they think is appropriate for someone (i.e. me) which they regard as an unforgiven (and maybe even unforgivable) traitor to humanity who owes humanity more subservience, agreeability, and passivity (and signs that I am suffering and generally not thriving as well as I actually think I ought to be especially given that I am motivated to practice exemplary self-care instead of "requisite" and relative self-neglect). It is fundamentally about The Patriarchy having to enforce a totalitarian regime of claustrophobic anthropocentrisim and "might makes right" justifying ongoing cyclical reinforcement of the male gender oppressing (via brute physical coercion and threat of using such) the female gender in order to ensure that Man always has a higher socioeconomic ranking and influence than Woman while Woman is stripped of almost everything except for what makes her useful to The Patriarchy (which means society, when operating in its most (cognitive) resource-conserving mode, strongly prefers to limit Woman to fundamentally nothing more than a Man's tool for sexual reproduction, sexual (and emotional) gratification, and menial slavery while only Man is eligible to pursue a higher education than elementary school and only Man is allowed to control and own physical or intellectual property or money (while Woman is treated as Man's property)). This is to say nothing of how human and non-human sentient beings are subject to what many if not most (currently living and adult-level) humans would classify as inhumane treatment in order to satisfy Man's craving for violence, slaughter, and dominion over beings he feels superior to (within the context of some overarching patriarchal socioeconomic (and political) hierarchy which is held firmly in place by a seemingly ubiquitous military-industrial complex powered by fossil fuels, nuclear reactions which generate substantial amounts of slow-decaying and highly toxic radioactive waste, and protein stolen from sentient animals which are mutilated and murdered (instead of replacing the traditional meat industry with plant-based protein and humane cultured meat production and mass marketing (which obviously is more sustainable and less cruel than traditional animal flesh harvesting).

I acknowledge that I may have gone "overboard" in promoting feminism or Enlightenment Era reminiscent sentiments (including futuristic and intellectual topics instead of merely focusing on Family as an institution headed exclusively by Man while subjugating Woman especially for sexual reproduction purposes). Then again, I could also say that "overboard" is a subjective and arbitrary opinion. The "bigger picture" of what I am attempting to communicate in this last paragraph of this note is that fairness itself is arbitrarily subjective and not absolutely enforceable. That is because one person's notion of what is fair or ethical could be logically or logistically incompatible with some other person's notion of fairness or ethics (which means that, ultimately (and from a relatively objective rather than subjective perspective) fairness and ethics are fundamentally subjective, personal, and arbitrary (unlike mathematical or physical phenomena which are relatively objective,  impersonal, and unconditionally coherent).