/** * file: journal_karbytes_17january2025.txt * type: plain-text * date: 17_JANUARY_2025 * author: karbytes * license: PUBLIC_DOMAIN */ Too many people (especially women) seem to be subtly or not so subtly asking (whether they are self-aware enough to know it or not) to be physically touched by any means. (I do mean to include that some people seem to want to get physically assaulted or sexually molested but are too cowardly, selfish, lazy, and dishonest to admit it). Then, once those "needy people" get the touch they pretend not to want, they act like victims and try to profit from it. What seems even worse (to those people) is to steadfastly refuse to give into their implicit or explicit demands that you demonstrate a lapse in your self-control, adherence to your ethical principles, and whatever else you take pride in and that those needy people are secretly or not so secretly envious of or feel threatened by (perhaps simply because you having something to take pride in about yourself means that you have something to "show off" to the larger encompassing network of intelligence which might take attention away from those needy people (because what we inhabit is an attention economy where it is crucial for one's survival to continuously advertise one's usefulness or relevance)). If I do not live to be a victim XOR else a perpetrator of "attacks" (exchanged between human individuals), then I apparently (according to those people) am boring at best and criminally "anti social" at worst (especially if I do not appear to be interested in engaging in non-solitary sexual activities and even more especially if I do not appear to be interested in securing a romantic partner to become economically, socially, and spiritually enmeshe with)). The main point I am attempting to make in this journal entry is admit that I am simply trying to exemplify being an adult single masculine-identifying (and asocial and apparently "Aspergerian") invidual whose primary (if not exclusive) goals in life are to maximize its autonomy and quality of its creative, intellectual, vocational, and recreational endeavors. In other words, "the purpose of my life" could simply amount to having fun while causing as little harm to what I deem to be "Sufficiently Sentient Information Processing Agents (SSIPAs)" (which means I make an effort to minimize how much I cause ANY SSIPAs to suffer (which means that I generally take a non-interventionist approach to dealing with SSIPAs other than myself and I assume that each SSIPA "naturally" (i.e. without deliberate intervention from humans) experiences plenty of "built-in" suffering from the ongoing challenges they face simply while trying to survive and pursue their own goals)). As "crazy" as this idea might sound, I had the idea earlier in response to dealing with "pig_gorl" being very aggravating to me (and that is to say nothing of some other "in the flesh" humans I dealt with yesterday while traveling out of town and going to a Starbucks only to get ganged up on and bullied by a bunch of pig-headed "Zionists"): "pig_gorl (and other members of XYZ) cannot be reasoned with and only make sense if you regard them as irrational, infantile, and deceptive in their attempts to get preferential treatment". (The most recent sentence is related to an even more profound thought which I had today: the not-so-new idea I have already written about in my blog that every human (and perhaps every other instance of SSIPA) is unconditionally and completely driven by ego-preserving logic. Even suicide is a way of attempting to (at least temporarily) proliferate or prolong some kind of message being sent which communicates the suicidee's ego preferences. What I find particulary disgusting is the way so many humans (especially women) make a living off of pretending to be indispensible to someone else's welfare while secretly campaining against those it takes care of from leaving them. In fact, I dare say that I have a hypothesis that most people only have kids in order to ensure that they will have "indentured servants" to take care of them in old age (and I think it is mostly why there is still an ecological crisis which could have been solved decades ago and why the cost of living is so ridiculously high for the relatively young generations deemed to be born "sufficiently close to the apocalypse" just in time for "the chosen ones" to be whisked away to a "better world" while those who remain on Earth perish along with the rest of its biosphere. There is simply not enough of an incentive for people to care for future generations of humanity. Hence, they just selfishly have kids in order to ensure they will not be denied basic resources (and young kids (and their legal guardians) are treated by society as being unconditionally deserving of basic necessities (which means the momma just has to keep pooping out a steady trickle of babies across decades to get a free ride while other people subsidize if not entirely pay for the cost of her and her babies so long as she does not make above a certain income)))). I won't go into detail about the unprofessional treatment I experienced at the hand of so-called professionals recently. I have already come to the conclusion that most humans are too steadfast in their selfishness to be of much use to me at this time. Also, I think the vast majority of humanity's suffering could be eliminated within a year (and without murdering innocent people) if more humans (and sufficiently many of them, of course) decided to seriously and directly tackle the pragmatic and urgent challenges instead of just trying to score "easy money" at jobs which are actually quite meaningless to every human (but which are appeal to "the patriarchy" by not allowing men and women to seriously THINK like modern adults but which stoke the egos of those who think earning a modicum of survival money and "bling" should be enough to be obnoxiously proud of and flaunting of when, to me, it is a pathetic instance of under-achievement normalized by the glut and growing cult of apathy, greed, laziness, conformity, cowardice, and lack of originality and qualities I and others genuinely find heroic and which beacons to us at a deep archetypal level). I find that most people come across as needy disgruntled children who want me to be at least as downtrodden and under developed (intellectually and emotionally) while they moan and complain that other people don't appreciate and serve them enough even though all those moaning complaining people do is insist they cannot do anything but rot their way to the grave and "struggle" to barely survive (when I see them mostly wasting what I would not). Lastly, in order to "get a job" I understand that I may need to appeal to "those people" even to the extent of pretending (at least "to their faces") to be just like them in the ways I described in this journal (which is what they seem to think is appropriately and admirably "humble"). I do not make an effort to be humble nor altrustic. I think I am "the right amount" of both of those things even though "those people" seem to vehemently disagree. (I tell myself "those people" have yet to "get a life" other than by trying to bring more twat fruits into this world when it is already overpopulated beyond capacity (or close enough, in my opinion)). In the end, I doubt there is any "all knowing" being nor "objective moral arbiter". Instead, I think all thre is are networks of interdependence or interaction between multiple nodes of a universe-wide informationa processing network (and some of its nodes are what I call SSIPAs). So I do not want more suffering to arise as a result of more time being spent by any SSIPA trying to appeal to an absolutely objective or omniscient god-like being and instead simply try to appeal exclusively to its own "authority". I would like to emphasize further what I said in the previous sentence. It is very important to karbytes that karbytes think of itself as the highest authority it knows to exist. That means it is entirely up to me to decide what is morally right and wrong, which goals are worth pursuing, and which information is relevant to me. I am not here to necessarily be any other SSIPA's moral or ideological authority but I do think I can provide SSIPAs other than myself a decent role model for how one could utilize its opportunities as a human to maximize its own happiness (which includes minimizing how much it incurs "unnatural" suffering for itself or for any other SSIPA). If readers would like to "cherry pick" this note or its encompassing network of websites (encompassed by the umbrella term karbytes) to only acknowledge the parts of it which appeal to those readers' egos, that is already expected by me as I write this note. The target audience of all karbytes content is future instances of karbytes which I am stongly motivated to work towards embodying. What prevents me from giving into self-destructive urges is the hope I have (which is, of course, science informed) that I will eventually arrive at a time in my current lifetime where I can say with honesty and confidence that I overcame what is threatening to end my life too quickly now (or what is constantly tempting me to hurt people other than myself or their property). I do not intend to ever commit offensive violence nor vandalism ever again but I do expect to have other people get away with doing those things to me (because "the authorities" are machismo-drunk swaggering pig-apes which too many women act like pathetic mentally retarded whore babies for (of for the provisions of)). Okay, one last paragraph before I close this note: I have kept the chapter of my blog named KARLINA_OBJECT_extension_pack_28 relegated to the dark web since 07_JANUARY_2025 in the format of an .onion website. I am planning on migrating KARLINA_OBJECT_extension_pack_28 to the light web (and, hence, making its respective GitHub repository permanently public instead of almost always private (except for the times I save its constituent light-web-hosted files to the WayBack Machine at Archive dot Org). So, technically, all of karbytes exits on the light web as saved copies of light-web-hosted files in the WayBack Machine's publicly-searchable database (which is notoriously hard for anyone to remove content from due to those saves being treated as immutable historical records by the WayBack Machine). Towards the end of this month (i.e. January 2025), I plan on making the aforementioned migration and then re-populating the website at the respecitve .onion address with content for KARLINA_OBJECT_extension_pack_29 and repeating that process (of first developing and hosting new karbytes content (almost exclusively) on the dark web (at exactly one .onion domain) and then, once that content is deemed to be "mature enough", that content is moved out of the .onion website and into the light-web website named Karbytes For Life Blog dot WordPress dot Com). Doing content development this way gives me a little more of a sense of control over my creative process by keeping most of the respective GitHub commits private until I am ready to share them. Also, this method basically forces readers to visit my .onion website so that it gets the traffic it craves. Eventually, I might stop or temporarily cease doing that dark-to-light website content transfer if that method becomes logistically impractical or if I simply grow tired of it. For now, I see no reason to stop engaging in this lovely process which I could say is my current (and expected future) default job (i.e. what I do whether I have a paid job or not which gives me a sense of creative, intellectual, and spiritual autonomy). * * * Now for an exceptionally honest remark: I am prone to making errors in my cognition which could be said to be a form of computational entropy. I doubt there is much (if anything) I can do to entirely prevent it. Hence, I will admit that I have the unsettling and unrelenting sense that I am being assaulted or ruined by environmental factors to the extent that it feels that I only have less than three years of "enjoyable lifespan" left for me to live before I am forced to live against my will in hellish circumstances that either are not brought on me by humans intentionally or which are being forced on me deliberately by humans other than myself. Perhaps I am not doing enough to advertise to other humans that I am worthy of their empathy or attention or material investment in my endeavors. Otherwise, they would have surely donated actual money to me via the PayPal donation link on my websites or talked to me more directly about my actual interests instead of treating me like little more than a clothes-wearing chimpanzee. I do think it might prolong my life and improve my health and relations with other people if I train myself to think in an optimistic rather than pessimistic or neutral manner (with respect to my goals and beliefs about free will and entropy). To be clear, I am suggesting that I might need to not be so absolutist in my committment to being as honest and realistic as possible in favor of entertaining "delusions" which enhance my sense of agency and wellness. After all, it is vain for me to think I will ever reach a point in my life where I can say with confidence that I am literally omniscient. It seems that, no matter what I think, I always have a sense that there is something missing from my knowledge (whether that missing part takes the form of sensory experiences or activated memories). Perhaps I am wrong and there really is some way to become cognizant of the fact that, in some conditions, it is possible for me to experience literal omniscience. Then, after I get a taste of that, I contract back into my more ignorant form (to avoid information overload which would prevent me from being able to comfortably live as a human in this particular universe).