/**
 * file: karbytes_31_october_2023.txt
 * type: plain-text
 * date: 01_NOVEMBER_2023
 * author: karbytes
 * license: PUBLIC_DOMAIN 
 */

Between 12:00AM Pacific Standard Time and 1:00AM Pacific Standard Time on 31_OCTOBER_2023, I uploaded the video file named pig_gorl_30_october_2023.mp4 to the GitHub repository which contains this plain-text note file and discovered that, when I tried to watch that video at the following raw GitHub file link, a new web browser window did not open up displaying solely that video in playback format. Instead what happened was that video file started getting downloaded. I went to the website named Karbytes For Life Blog dot WordPress dot Com and clicked on hyperlinks leading to raw GitHub video files and noticed that the file was downloaded instead of a playback video browser window opening. Then I saved the URL below to the WayBack Machine as a newly saved web page and saw that the WayBack Machine save of that URL leads to a playback format of that video such that the video can be watched directly on the WayBack Machine without having to download that video onto one's local machine.

https://raw.githubusercontent.com/karlinarayberinger/KARLINA_OBJECT_extension_pack_3/main/pig_gorl_30_october_2023_part_0.mp4

* * *

I have been writing some "dark" things in journal entries which may or may not be accessible to the public on my blogging website which seem to have finally culminated tonight around 1AM when I got upset enough by someone's behavior towards me who I was Facebook friends with until tonight when I decided to unfriend that person as a way of communicating to that person and to others and to myself that I am not okay with continuing to pretend such behavior does not cause me enough distress to seem disruptive to my ability to function as well as I think I ought to. I do not like being that angry that frequently especially over issues which seem to recur instead of get permanently and satisfactorily resolved. I got tired of having to excuse other people to get away with covertly antagonizing me while I kept it (mostly) a secret for the sake of avoiding further drama and because I take pride in myself as someone who does not get sucked into drama (which has been contradicted by tonight's videos of some young man and I getting into a bit of a fight but ultimately neither one of us ended up doing anything to physically hurt the other). I think that if it were not for the personal issue related to the aforementioned Facebook unfriending, I would have simply put on headphones and loud music instead of getting up and demanding that the guy leave merely because he was rapping loudly.

He and I might as well both be living on the street right now. Neither one of us is more deserving of existence. I think it is cool that he is able to have fun out here. I am the one acting high maintenance by insisting that I have my own quiet and private space instead of getting used to being in public all the time and on my own most of the time as an introvert who can live in harmony with almost anyone else around me. Being that comfortable in the presence of others seems like a nice ideal for me to have but, at the same time, a part of me is calling bullshit because that part of me knows that there is no substitute for having a private and adequately furnished enclosure in which to dwell alone for the purpose of enjoying uninterrupted solitude and self indulgence.

I am a bit disturbed by some of the violent and misanthropist things I have written recently and how I behaved tonight (i.e. when I picked up that metal chair and threatened to use it as a weapon to strike that guy who was not doing anything to make me feel physically endangered). I think I may have increased my odds significantly that I will get beaten up when I am not suspecting it in public because of my cocky behavior. I admit to acting a lot more confident, street smart, and full of self esteem than what is probably the truth. I found that out tonight and I am now starting to feel comfortable with the idea of dying much younger than I thought I would and being much poorer and much more unpopular (and perhaps marginalized and maligned) than I thought I would be over ten years ago back when I thought I was guaranteed to have a life of luxury, prestige, and esteem from many others. I heard that guy and his friend talking about always being under stress. I did not grow up black and poor in a rough part of the Bay Area. Instead, I grew up in a relatively sheltered and well-to-do part of the Bay Area which is known for being home to Nazis. Castro Valley does not seem very white supremacist right now because it seems to be very racially diverse. It is a nice place to live and I think I am definitely a bit spoiled by having spent most of my life there (which is why I feel a bit out of my element outside of Castro Valley). There is no place in the world like that town I grew up in (which has a small town feel and the sense that I was well known throughout the town). Outside of that town I am just another "nobody" just like everyone else seems to be. I am just one of approximately 8 billion humans which currently dwell on Planet Earth. Objectively speaking, no human is more important than any other human. Each human has a measurable impact on society and the universe as a whole.

* * *

It is approximately 8:30PM Pacific Standard Time on 31_OCTOBER_2023 and I am charging my electronics while typing this note. Last night I was able to grab two extra sweaters out of the closet of my dad's room last night (and I tried to select sweaters which do not seem to ever get worn by anyone so as to not impede anyone's style (and it should be noted that I claim that, if I had my way, I would never resort to intentionally trying to make any person suffer out of animosity (and if I did attempt to make a person suffer I would be doing so solely for the purpose of mitigating the overall suffering of the universe I inhabit))). I am also wearing my dark gray loose-fitted jeans with a belt which is not made from animal products on top of my shorts with my sleeping bag and sleeping liner covering the parts of my body which seem to be most sensitive to heat loss. I am outside charging my electronics at the BART station as usual. Sometimes I seem to get away with doing that (almost always at night) but during the day I am almost always told to leave if security personnel see me at the charging port. There are other places to charge electronics in the shopping center less than a quarter mile away but I prefer to avoid hanging out in that area because they are a bit too crowded for my hermetic preferences. Where I usually hang out is in places I think are reasonably hidden such that I am invisible to most civilians (but I do suspect that I the government has assigned me to have some public broadcasting signals which alerts the general public of my "real time" whereabouts, Internet traffic, and even thought content so that those people can plan ahead and prevent me from doing anything which they do not approve of because I am supposed to be some wayward delinquent who is forced to stay underemployed and chronically stressed out because of other people's antagonistic meddling so that I do not escape poverty and change my behavior in ways which are beneficial to me (and to others) because what is voted into existence by popular demand is that I be prevented from advancing myself so that I am forced to suffer as punishment for what other people see as unforgiven injustices which I have committed and/or because those people decided that my only value to them is to serve as some kind of martyr-like scapegoat to suffer on their behalf despite the fact that I do not consent to such exploitation).

The last part of what I said seems to trigger a lot of people who seem to be flabbergasted that I am not more willing to serve humanity as another martyr to be sacrificed and tortured and prevented from doing what I originally set out to do with my life so that "those people" have a human companion animal and icon not allowed to leave the premises and enjoy a more private and dignified existence so that "those people" do not feel so disadvantaged in comparison. My suffering might be what keeps them warm and cozy at night (and society seems to regard such people as being infinitely more deserving of nice things than I am).

I understand that the content I have added to this GitHub repository within the past 48 hours is a bit immature and low quality (according to karbytes content and process quality standards) compared to what I added to this repository before 30_OCTOBER_2023. I decided to keep that content despite having thoughts that I should remove that "low brow" content from this public GitHub repository and instead put it all in one of my private GitHub repositories for at least the following reason: to supply what I hope is the first and last collection of empirical evidence documenting my violent and ethically unsound (criminal)propensities so that I do not have to procure another example ever again nor have to behave in such an unnecessarily risky way ever again. I anticipate that many people will do things which annoy me to the extent that my activities are disrupted, delayed, and maybe even "canceled" altogether. What I demand of myself that I do for now on (but officially starting at midnight on 01_NOVEMBER_2023) is refrain from doing anything which I think would incite someone to become violent or otherwise destructive despite having thoughts such as, "It is not fair that I always try my best not to make other people feel bad but they often vehemently try to make me feel bad (and often they do not stop harassing me until I react in a way which obviously falls short of karbytes' standards of personal conduct). Therefore, maybe the quickest and perhaps only way for me to mitigate my suffering (at feeling that injustice is being committed against me but not against those committing what I consider to be injustice against me) is to retaliate against those people and intentionally try to cause them suffering (to communicate that I am not willing to be the designated pacifist and shit-taker in every situation (all the while not getting rewarded for it))."

There is an unlisted web page of the website named Karbytes For Life Blog dot WordPress dot Com named box_of_gems which technically is linked to from a listed web page of that website if one knows exactly where to look. (By "unlisted" I mean not obviously accessible just by clicking on hyperlinks on the home page of that website and whatever pages of that website those hyperlinks open up when clicked on. By "listed", I mean content which is hosted on that website and which is obviously accessible just by clicking on hyperlinks on the home page of that website and whatever pages of that website those hyperlinks open up). That aforementioned unlisted web page displays approximately one hundred hyperlinks to unlisted web pages within that website (including journal entry web pages which add context to the recent influx of "low brow" content on the listed portion of my blogging platform). I claim that all web pages within that website are technically listed web pages but do not obviously appear as such because I made a point of hiding clues about what those "unlisted" web pages are about inside of nondescript and compact hyperlink symbols such as the following three-character string: "(*)". I claim that any and all web pages of that website (and of the website named Karlina Object dot WordPress dot Com) can be found by using the built-in WordPress dot Com website search feature at the following "nonexistent web page" address:

https://karbytesforlifeblog.wordpress.com/666

(Hint: to look up all web pages which were last updated on a specific date, enter the date (in the format DAY_MONTH_YEAR where DAY is replaced by a sequence of exactly two unsigned integers such as 01, MONTH is replaced by a capitalized month name from the Gregorian calendar such as JANUARY, and YEAR is replaced by an unsigned integer such as 1970) into the search form text box. Then click the SEARCH button to generate a list of all web pages of that website which contain the input search term character sequence).

Lastly, before I close this journal entry once and for all, I want to mention a short video I saw on Instagram today by Michael Stevens (@electricpants) about human memory and how each time a human recalls a memory depicting an experience from that human's past, that human conjures up a unique rendering of that particular past event such that each successive reconstruction (generated by that particular human's brain) of that particular event is more warped than the last. What was mentioned in that video was how humans might not have any objective basis by which to assess the accuracy and completeness of their own brain's memories other than some kind of external memory recording system. What I am especially partial to with in regards to the previous sentence is the verbatim (i.e. entirely lossless and entirely warpless) information storing system which commodifies information in the form of digital files (and those digital files can be reliably backed up to limitlessly many physical mediums such that those digital files undergo zero warping over time irregardless of how old the patterns of information those digital files literally represent are).