/**
 * file: journal_karbytes_06september2025_p0.txt
 * type: plain-text
 * date: 06_SEPTEMBER_2025
 * author: karbytes
 * license: PUBLIC_DOMAIN
 */

I love everyone, but I love some beings more than I love other beings.

While I strive to maximize the awareness that I am all things (i.e. that I am God), I also find it somewhat challenging to also play the role of karbytes (who is "just a humanoid"). I have been idealizing the notion of karbytes as God recognizing itself in a particular humanoid format but that seems to leave a void where there should be a humanoid identity (because role-playing that I am everything seems to contradict me role-playing that I am "just me" (i.e. just karbytes (which is a subset of everything rather than the entirety of everything))).

(Note that I am not religious and that I am functionally an atheist (if God is assumed to be some kind of omniscient and possibly omnipotent being). I am technically not an atheist if I define God as being synonymous with all of reality (which is what I am doing in this journal entry). Generally, I avoid using the word God given that the word God is historically or generally associated with things which the entirety of reality is not. In other words, I avoid using the word God because it anthropomorphizes nature rather than frames nature in a more culturally and teleologically neutral manner).

The being I probably love most is myself (i.e. karbytes). The beings I love second-most are probably my parents, siblings, and closest friends, family, and acquaintances (especially if those beings were instrumental in supporting karbytes' ambitions and wellbeing). 

To be brutally honest, I could say that, if I role-play that I am God (using the pantheist definition I already inferred earlier in this journal entry), then I could say that the only love possible is self-love. In other words, if I am karbytes role-playing that I am God role-playing that it is karbytes role-playing that it is God (which I am doing in this journal entry as a thought experiment), then I could say that there are "strings of love" between me and every other entity that ever exists or that could exist (but some strings are thicker (in salience to karbytes) than others).

(I generally avoid using subjective and culturally-loaded words such as "love", but in the context of this journal entry I define "love" as being consciousness invested in the wellbeing of what it is directed at).