/**
 * file: karbytes_12_march_2024.txt
 * type: plain-text
 * date: 12_MARCH_2024
 * author: karbytes
 * license: PUBLIC_DOMAIN
 */

While I was walking my (intentionally damaged by humans other than myself) bicycle up Redwood Road at the intersection of Proctor Road, some oldish white man walking his little dog seemed to read my body language that I was irritated by feeling engulfed by so many control freak humans clamoring for my attention and seemed to demand implicitly that I return his enthusiastic and forceful greeting with the fervor of a scared and loyally submissive dog unconditionally "happy" to be greeted by a human. I used to almost always respond as I described out of a mostly subconscious fear of being punished if I did not. This time I decided to remain stone faced and ignore the man. Shortly afterwards many people seemed to go out of their way in some kind of mass intervention effort to intimidate me back into being their submissive fake gregarious dog. I have never been more disgusted at the entitlement some humans demonstrate and I have never felt more resolute than I do now about willfully ignoring humans who seem to demand that I instantaneously and exclusively on their whim morph into the dolphin-like caricature they seem to demand manifest before their eyes and mewl only the sweet nothings their fragile egos can stand to hear. 

I have finally lost that lingering "guilt" (more like fear of being punished) about not conforming to social norms and not acting "sufficiently polite". A lot of that recent loss of concern for whether or not other people (especially non STEM majoring extroverts) approve of me is realizing that I can relatively easily get a job doing something relatively non-social and non child centric such as warehouse logistics jobs and information technology (because I seriously used to think I would not be able to get any job other than customer service roles in local shops such as fast food restaurants and convenience stores as a cashier). As a corollary to what I just said, I no longer subscribe to the belief that loyalty and having intimate relationships with humans or even "hanging out" with them outside of professional or emergency contexts is mandatory (lest I be ganged up on, baited and switched, psychologically tortured, and tricked into being incarcerated in a prison or psychiatric ward and, from there after, deprived even further of job opportunities and privacy). I feel no malaise about my recently solidified stance that I am a staunch misanthrope. I think my misanthropy is well informed and effective way to adapt to a civilization populated mostly by bumbling cowardly idiots who seem to be very bad at thinking independently and in a rigorously logical and strategic manner. Too many adult humans sound and behave like overly conformist, psychologically fragile wimps whose crocodile tears move me not. 

There are more important problems to me than entitled brats not getting the admiration and recognition they feel they deserve just for being born and raised on "the right side of the tracks" (metaphorically and idiomatically speaking). Such people seem indifferent to what my most pressing concerns are. I do not think it is fruitful nor ethical for me to try to directly impart my wisdom on them. Instead, I will leave them to fend for themselves in the wild. Speaking of wild, I think society and myself sees me as more of a wild animal than as a tame and unconditionally loyal and obedient pet. Hence, I feel the need to physically distance myself from those I cannot help but see as domesticated to the point of being physically and mentally hobbled. 

I prefer to believe and actually believe that the universe humans live in is fundamentally an anarchy where organisms can do whatever they want within some physical parameters and that culture and social policies are little more than collective role play games. People have been lying, cheating, stealing, and committing violence for thousands of years. I doubt it will ever truly stop (unless the entire population evolves to a sufficiently more sophisticated level of intelligence in which reincarnation and/or sacrificing oneself willingly for "the greater good" is universally understood, esteemed, and practiced).

* * *

Lastly, I would like to add to this note an idea I had earlier about how I think that the universe I live inside of at the time this note is being written (and then later read by my future selves) neither began at some point nor that this universe has been cyclically fluctuating between indefinitely many "Big Bang" expansion points each followed or preceded by indefinitely many "Big Crunch" contraction points but, rather, that this universe has been expanding in size without ever shrinking for an indefinitely long time and will continue to do so for an indefinitely long time.