The Wash Stand : TEI edition
author: Lou Burnard

[cue A]

Persil is the softest wash, soothing
red knickers to sargasso depths

Omo kept us clean, covering
filth in forgetful suds, feeding
a little life with dried foam.

Rinso surprised us, pouring from the machine
we stopped in the j.c.r.
and drank coffee, and talked for an hour
(cue B)

I wash, much of the night, and go mad in the winter.
(cue C)

What are the suds that pour, what waters flow
out of this soapy rubbish?

Son of man
You cannot say, or guess, for you know only
A heap of empty packets, where the neon glows
and broken furniture gives no shelter, the iron no warmth
and the dryer no sound of water. Only
there is Daz under this red cardboard.

Come in under the shadow of this red cardboard
(cue D)

Madame Sosistris, washday expert
had a bad cold nevertheless
is known to be the wisest woman in Europe
with a wizard pack of pegs.

Here

said she

is the answer to your query Mrs Blake
do not use with a flame-resistant finish
Here is Fairy Snow, here Proctor and Gamble
and this peg your free gift. I do not find
imperfect whiteness. Fear death by water.
(Lights)
I see crowds of housewifes, washing in a ring
Thank you. If you see dear Mrs Equitine
Tell her I bring persilicates myself;
One must be so careful these days

[(cue E) (linking movement, washing, circle, regroup)]

O

O

O

O

that Shakespeherian rag

It's so filthy

so scrubby

what shall we do now, what shall we do?

I shall wash out in the streets, as I am,
with my hair down.

What shall we do tomorrow?

Washing, again washing.

Do you know washing? Do you see washing? Do you remember Washing?

I remember. "Do not use with a flame-resistant finish"
(cue F)

The hot water at ten
And if it rains, an indoor washing line
And we shall scrub the collars,
pressing cuffless shirts, and waiting for the FairySnowMan at the door

[(mime: A, representing the FairySnowMan, knocks, enters to C; the famous dumb - or bumb - show screw. meanwhile, cue G]

Twit

Twit

Twit

Jug-jug

Jug

Jug

So rudely forced

Tereu

(cue H)

To staircase 13 than I came
rinsing rinsing RINSING
rinsing
(he is laid to rest)
O Bendix, thou spinnest me out
O Bendix, thou spinnest
rinsing
(cue I)

Proctor the Phoenician, a fortnight dead
Forgot the tails of shirts, and the deep spin swell
And the fourpence off.

As he drained away
He passed the fourth and fifth rinse
Entering the whirlpool

Warmwash or hot
O you who turn the knob and watch the wash-line
Consider Proctor who once gambled as well as you.

(transitional movement as before; cue J)

If there were Persil

And no daz

If there were Daz

And also Persil

And persil

A packet, washing whiter

If there were the smell of Persil only

Not dry furniture singing

and the smell of burning nylons
But the scent of Persil over the machine
frothing to the floor

Drip

Drop

Drip

Drop

Drop drop drop

But there is no Persil
(cue K)

THEN SPOKE THE BENDIX

(cue L)

DAZ

(cue M)

Dazzle. What have we washed?
Our smalls, whiter than white
shrunken to the moment's surrender
in our empty rooms

(cue N)

DAZ

(cue O)

Dazzling: I have seen the dryer
tumbling, red hat and silent
in fetid air. aethereal rumours
revive for a moment a broken dramsoc.

(cue P)

DAZ

(cue Q)

Dazzled: The iron responded
Gaily, to the hand expert with shirt and trouser.
The board was still, smoothing obedient
to controlling hands.

(cue R)

I sat upon the steps
naked with socks whirling before me.
Shall I at least set my drawers in order?

Strawberry fields forever, forever, forever

Je marche le longue de ces couloirs interminables

(tearfully)
O Rinso, rinso.

These fragments I have shored against my ruins
Why then Ile fit you. Birtwhistle's mad againe.
Dazzle. Dazzling. Dazzled.

softrinse softrinse softrinse

[cue S]